u/Forward-Register9189

I am not sure if I added the appropriate flair. Regardless, I am a 20 years old woman who comes from a rough background. My parents' marriage has never been stable, but this year, they finally separated. Due to my parents' marriage, our family life has always been terrible, and my mother especially was a terrible parent; very abusive, always screaming at us and hitting us.
I come from a well-off background but due to my parents terrible planning, we became poor and in immense debt. I know this might be irrelevant to some people, but it really took a toll on me, especially education wise. I had to drop out of school for a few years, among other things.
Moving out is not an option right now, but I am saving up, and in a few years, I will be moving out.
I was just wondering about stability and discipline: I have never been particularly disciplined and most days, I can describe my mental state as very depressed and out of it most of the time. I have been able to keep a steady schedule for months every now and then, but I end up crashing out really badly. Right now, it's exam season and I have been able to keep a steady schedule since January: working, studying daily and I have been forced to be responsible for all household chores by my mother. But other things are difficult for me to keep up: consistent hygiene, socialising, going out, hobbies.
My friends tell me: Well, you have been able to stay disciplined with your priorities for months now and your environment is tough. Brace yourself.
I agree! I am very proud of myself, I have come along way from the girl I was 5 months ago—suicidal, sleeping 15 hours a day and sobbing, spending the rest of the day binge watching/doom-scrolling/jumping from one addiction to another simply to numb the pain and to escape my sorrowful reality.

I have made incredible progress, but I would like to be stable not just consistent. I would also love to live a non-mechanical life. I barely socialise, go out, interact with people. And due to my family's terrible environment, the constant screaming/fights get to me and drain my energy really bad, so when I am not working and studying through out the day, I find myself trying to escape reality through one of my old habits, and it makes me feel terrible.

I journal and read, which helps. I guess these are my only hobbies as of now, and I wish, if I could add more. Even those, I am not consistent with.
I tried swapping the time I spend escaping with other hobbies and it is just not feasible. When I am in escape-mode, I am just not cognitively on par with someone who's able to mentally process and comprehend well.

TL;DR: Abusive & dysfunctional environment -> emotionally draining -> escapism -> somewhat disciplined with priorities but not truly stable

Let me preface this by acknowledging that Jodha/Harika is clearly Jalal's most-treasured consort, but I don't understand why the show did not highlight her relationship with her Hindu Co-wives, Jalal being intimate with his other consorts and Jodha's reaction to it, and Jalal having children from other consorts.
Evidently, the show shows that Jodha was incredibly jealous by him being with other women, so why was this never highlighted? Especially after the birth of his other children.
This fact was highlighted in many other historical shows, and it's absurd it's not highlighted her after Akdha considering he was a very promiscuous man in real life. Even Magnificent century highlights this fact, and Suleiman is one of the few loyal royal men historically