Partner doesn’t do much [28m] [25f]
I’m 28m and me and my girlfriend have been together for about 5 years now, we took almost 8 months off during that time period. I had originally had called it off to needs not being met for long periods of time.
I’m not one to typically complain because I have my moments of laziness, my moments of depression where i don’t want to do anything and I absolutely understand. I have always supported my girlfriend no matter what, she had periods of time where no work was taking her in and i was there through thick and thin. After she got back on her feet I ended up calling it off because it just felt like a one way relationship. Eventually time passed and she reached out to me and i decided to give her a 2nd chance. We moved in and have been living together for a couple about 5 months now, and I mostly do everything at home now. Back the I was at least 97% of the person that had to travel to make time for each other, so I always had to pack my stuff and made sure I had everything. Of course I had times where I would forget things and I would have to drive home to grab it for work or whatever. It became a regular thing eventually. If I slept in, i was probably gonna forget something. Not a big deal we lived about 15 mins apart and it would only add about 10 mins to my drive to work. I never had time to really eat, I always just zoomed over because if we didn’t hang out my girlfriend would be upset. When we got back together all that disappeared. I thought she had matured and grew up. Promises were made about improving and how things were gonna look up.
Now we live together and she just sleeps in super later and goes to bed late. If i don’t encourage going to bed early she won’t. Now I don’t really care about that but the whole point is hopefully she’ll get up to help with chores. Go to bed when you want but she always wakes up with like 2 hours before work. Gets ready and then i’m stuck with all the chores. It’s been brought up a couple times and i’m always adamant about not wanting her to do it all, just please help. It’s daily stuff, feed the cats, wash the dishes from dinner, if it’s trash day take the trash out. I’m always responsible for cooking either before i leave for work or after when i get home. Don’t want her to always cook but at least help.
I’m trying to start a business and it has consumed more of my time but now I’m just stuck with it all. She spends her time talking about getting married and where she wants to travel and go for a honeymoon but i’m like hey there’s more to life than just that and i’m at my wits end. She does work and I have her pay a portion of rent, phone bill, insurance and sometimes groceries
Since we’ve moved in together i just don’t know what to do anymore. I want to make my business work so she can spend less time at work and just stay at home but it’s not looking promising.
Any more details please ask. I’m open to me possibly being the problem but i’m just exhausted