u/Freepurrs

Have you heard the saying “in vino veritas?” about people speaking the truth when tipsy? Caregiver sleep deprivation has made me more honest. I know the guilt will come when I’m less delirious, but right now I feel bad for NOT feeling bad.

Parent: “Did you tell Mike [favorite kid] I’m in the hospital”

Me: “No, you said not to”

Parent: “Good, I don’t want him to worry about me.”

Me: “He never worries about you.”

Parent: “He’s busy”

Me: “ok”

[FYI: He’s in his 30s, has never worked regularly by choice, & still gets a monthly allowance + his & his GF’s rent is paid].

Parent: “When he calls, you answer & tell him about my surgery”

Me: “He won’t call. Unless he needs money.”

Parent (smugly): “He’ll definitely call today!”.

Me: “Omg, You fake having bank problems with direct deposit to get him to call you?! Hahahaha. And he still won’t care about the hospital. You bet on the wrong horse”

Parent: pretends to sleep

Tis the truth.

Now to power nap, then get back to work, & this circus will continue.

Mine have always done this & I hated it. But now they don’t bother to wait until the person is out of ear shot, or they aren’t wearing their glasses and can’t see that they haven’t ended the phone call.

I wish I had worked harder to curb their bad habit earlier in life, because it wrecks everything, especially since we’re in a small town & share a last name (so I’m guilty by association).

No one is ever being mean to them, but they get called an a-hole, bitch or worse before the call hangs up, or before they have walked far away. They do it to everyone, including doctor’s office staff, waiters, pharmacists and repair people.

They look physically healthy, so they come across as petty & mean as hell.

I can only apologize for them so much before people either ignore their (our) calls, or fire them from their services. Their longtime yard man told me he’s not coming by anymore. I cannot blame him. It’s so exhausting & of course, they will never see that it’s 100% their fault. Then they call up scammy companies because they have been blacklisted by the reliable services in our town.

I can’t fully blame cognitive decline because they have always been difficult & spiteful, but usually reserved their worst insults for family.