Everyone thinks I am doing well, but I feel like an imposter
I am a 33-year-old male in the UK, and for nearly all of my adult life I have struggled with consumerism, self-sabotage, and isolation. This has left me with persistent manageable debt, zero wealth (despite having good opportunities), no meaningful relationships and mental/ physical issues.
However, I proved to myself in the past couple of years that I have the capacity and discipline to change. I fell in love with powerlifting (PL) and got into the best shape of my life. I've built a pseudo-social circle at my gym and in the local PL community.
Despite this win, my self-worth hasn't caught up. Recently, a younger gym member described me positively as an "adult pro" when we were talking about maturity. I laughed, because internally, I only see my failings and know they wouldn't see me the same if they knew.
It’s the same story at work. My department just went through a turbulent period of TUPE and redundancies, and I’ve been handed a massive opportunity to step up and show my worth. Instead of thriving, my imposter syndrome has kicked into overdrive, manifesting with procrastination and demand avoidance.
But no more. I’m tired of hiding from my own potential. I’m drawing a line in the sand. My immediate steps are:
* **Follow my financial plan:** Sticking to a budget to clear my debt and curb impulsive spending/ build good habits.
* **Commit to physical wellbeing:** Transitioning from just being strong, to correcting my eating habits and committing fully to overall health.
* **Habit building:** Prioritising sleep, hitting daily step goals, reading, and minimising screen time to combat the procrastination.
* **Community connection:** Stepping outside my comfort zone to volunteer. I am finally going to attend my local *Andy’s Man Club* and continue my volunteer work at the local powerlifting federation.
If you’ve transitioned from self sabotage to actually believing your own hype, how did you do it?