u/Fried_Shrimp_Enjoyer

I go to log in. Oops! I made a typo. Aw shucks, I ran out of password attempts.

Good thing I've got my 2FA

"We need one more verification method"

Simple enough.

"That verification method isn't working right now. Please try another method."

Bugger! Let me use my recovery code.

"There's a temporary problem with the service. Please try again. If you continue to get this message, try again later."

Okay, time for me to call support.

"We don't handle these on call anymore, go to the Microsoft website." "Go to the support tool." "Go to the recovery tool." "Useful? No? Try watching this short video." "Was that video useful? No? To get access to support, sign in."

"We need one more verification method." "That verification method isn't working right now. Please try another method." "There's a temporary problem with the service. Please try again. If you continue to get this message, try again later." "Go to the support tool."

And again, and again, and again. I'm starting to think you can't even get to the end of it. It's designed to not let you do anything, just lead you around in a circle forever. It's not even subtle about it, it's like those business cards that say "Idiot test! If you'd like to know how to keep an idiot busy, flip the card over!" on both sides.

How do I fix this? Can I fix it? Please tell me I can fix it. Or that I can at least wait a while for it to unfuck itself and that it's some temporary block because Microsoft thinks it's suspicious that... I have access to all my security tools. This couldn't have happened at a worse time. This time I'm really going to fucking do it.

This one is quite esoteric. Rapidly blinking blue LEDs and benign computer problems mess with my head. I immediately feel a sense of immense dread and terror, and often depersonalise. A couple times this has triggered a manic-depressive episode which has resulted in hospitalisation.

I'm sure this is the result of me generalising the stress and anxiety associated with technical problems to the stimulus of throbbers and blue screens. The strange thing is I'll never have these issues in the moment. A problem in private that I have the power to fix? I'll simply fix it. Blue LED sign on a storefront? Dry retching, fetal position, shivering. Big mess. It's humiliating, having a seizure from a random blinking blue light like I'm witnessing an Ophanim. I feel like that video of the guy crying at the Star Wars trailer when it happens. I have to plan around it with friends and family because despite it happening for years they think I'm a psycho.

I never thought I'd say it, but Psychiatrists think I'm crazy. They don't believe me when I say Bill Gates psychically raping me is the cause of my seizures. I'm serious. I used to control them with alcohol and benzodiazapines, but quit when I realised I hadn't remembered anything from the last 12 months of my life.

What next?!!