Fair warning: This is a long rant
My now 18 year old niece has had this issue of having nasty mood swings from what seems like anything. She loses something of hers or something goes wrong no matter how big or small? She has the same level of reaction of this high-strung anxious foul mood & will project it onto others. You try to help her with an issue that she came to you for? She’ll get mean and/or disrespectful when you try to help her. You ask her to do the routine chores that she’s been given for years? She typically claims she’s tired(she has a bad sleeping schedule) or has a headache and then just doesn’t do them at all (sometimes has the audacity to say “why don’t you just do it?” if you confront her.) There’s “nothing in the house to eat” including that dinner you made which she’ll easily call nasty to you face? she’ll starve herself and let it put her in a bad mood which she’ll then project onto everyone in the household. She says something in a mean/cold/attitude-like tone or flashing her eyes/rolling her eyes/making stank faces or just saying something straight-up rude? She’ll make it seem like it’s a ‘you’ issue, act obtuse about why you didn’t like what she did and say how she didn’t think it was mean or rude. Meanwhile this girl is sensitive as HELL- I remember when she was at me and my moms house, she got into a foul mood in my room(don’t know why), she was being short/cold with me and I didn’t like how it was changing my comfy atmosphere- so I asked her to “please go downstairs and come back when you’re in a better mood”. Reasonable right? She cried to my mom about that and was upset. I wasn’t even mean to her about it.
Nothing is easy with this girl, for any issue that can be simply resolved- she can make it a whole ordeal of complications beyond belief. When it comes to chores and taking accountability for her words/actions- she always wants to argue and go back-n-forth with my sister as she tries reason to with her until my sister finally rages to tears and then my niece will act like she’s been the reasonable one the whole time, doesn’t know why her moms restricting privileges, calls her “a horrible mother”(total bs) & “has no empathy for her,” bringing up her age “wow, you’re acting like this and pushing 40” and calling her names all while being very sensitive for themselves, completely dependent on others for her well-being even after behaving horribly, but afraid to talk to a store associate or kill bugs on her own or ask for extra sauce at a restaurant on their own!
This is what my sister goes through with her daughter who’s 18 years old, graduated from high school almost a year ago, no job and completely dependent on others for her wellbeing. My sister only requires her to wash dishes and pick her little sister up from the school bus Mon-Fri- but will consistently fight her on that.
At this point, I can’t deal with her myself either- when things get really heated between her mom and my niece, my sister will ask to drop her off at me and my moms place. That’s fine- the only conditions required is that she’s respectful to both me and my mother. She was given no chores and was able to do whatever she wanted in our household. A pretty sweet deal right? But she’s tried to rise against me and my mother several times and even argues back when telling her “If you’re going to live here, you will treat my mom and me with respect”. She reacts poorly to authority. One example is when I was WFH in the afternoon and my niece was in my room playing Roblox- my mother was out and called my niece 2 times shortly in-between about picking up packages at the door and expressed a lot of concern about porch pirates possibly stealing it. I then spoke to my niece asking if she could get the packages because it seemed like it was important to my mom. She complained saying “how come she’s never here to get her own packages?” and how “some of the packages are too heavy to pick up.” I said leave the heavy packages to me. She gets the packages and comes back under a whole new big funky mood. Where did this mood come from when I asked about it? “You were talking to me when I was busy doing a mission on Roblox.” I swiftly explained to her, “you’re not going to shut me up in my own household that I pay rent at, in my own room that you’re in, laying on my bed while playing my games on my console.” She stayed in this nasty mood for so long that it turned into a whole discussion when my mom came back and eventually my sister came over because this non-existent problem turned huge. When I explained to both that she’s upset because my mom asked her to get packages at the front porch and is mad that I said something at all to her about the packages, they both looked at her like she was being ridiculous and she was. After that explanation, she tried to deny it was about the packages and pin the entire reason that she’s in a bad mood on me because I said something- as if that makes her case any better when it actually makes it even more ridiculous. That’s when I outted her to my mom letting her know that my niece complained about how your never here to get your packages as well- so she was mad about my mom calling her to get packages too and my niece got quiet after that.
Sorry for the long rant, but I needed to get this out. This girl is just entitled, lazy, argumentative and toxic. I cannot deal with her….