Hi everyone, I need to vent a little and maybe also feel like I’m not alone in this.
I’m currently 5 months pregnant and I work as a freelancer from home, just like my husband. We’ve been gradually telling our clients that we’re expecting a baby.
The reactions on his side are always just congratulations. On my side, there are congratulations too, but they’re immediately followed by questions like: what will happen with the projects, whether they should start looking for someone new, whether I’ll be able to handle it, who will take care of the baby, and so on.
Honestly, it makes me feel like I have to defend myself. Up until now, I’ve had great results, my clients are happy, I meet all deadlines, and my work runs smoothly without any issues.
I understand that motherhood and childbirth are demanding, and that it’s natural to think about work organization. But it feels incredibly unfair. No one asks my husband how he’s going to handle it, who will take care of the baby, or whether he’ll need to reduce his workload. It’s automatically assumed that most of it will fall on me.
The thing is, my husband is amazing, and we’ve already agreed that we’ll share childcare in a way that allows me to keep working. We’ll both be cutting back on some projects so we have enough time for both work and the baby, and so we can take turns taking care of him. It’s obvious things won’t work exactly the same as before, which is why we’re both only keeping the collaborations that we genuinely enjoy and that also make financial sense.
I’m also preparing for the postpartum period myself – I’m getting all my work ready in advance so that August/September is covered, and my clients can feel secure knowing everything will continue running smoothly even when I’m briefly offline after giving birth. My work is something that can be planned really well, and I’m able to prepare everything so it can run automatically.
And still, I’m afraid this will follow me forever – that clients will underestimate me just because I have children, that they’ll treat me differently than before, and that I’ll constantly have to prove myself.
Has anyone else experienced something similar? I’m feeling really frustrated about it, and honestly, sometimes I even find myself indirectly feeling angry at my husband, even though I know this isn’t really his fault… 😕