I started my nanny job a little over a month ago for a nice family with a 5 month old. When we first had my trial day we discussed some household things that I could do every now and then. Some of them included changing laundry from washer to dryer, occasionally putting dishes in the dishwasher, and the rest being childcare related. Both parents WFH. During my trial, MB’s desk wasn’t set up yet because she wasn’t starting work for another week. Fast forward to my first day and her work desk is in the nursery—she said it would be moved that weekend. It’s now been four weeks and it’s still there, which makes it really hard to access baby’s clothes and care items since that’s where everything is stored.
The baby actually sleeps in the parents’ bedroom, not the nursery, but all of her clothes, diapers, and supplies are kept in the nursery, so I’m constantly needing to go in and out of that space. With the desk there, it just makes the setup very difficult to use.
As for household chores, she now leaves me sticky notes every day with a list of tasks. It’s no longer “occasional”—it feels like a daily expectation that I’m doing household assistant duties on top of full childcare. I fold their laundry regularly, the diaper pail doesn’t get changed unless I do it, and bottles from the previous day are often left for me. She’s also asked me to do things like help clean out the freezer, which definitely wasn’t part of what we discussed.I also meal prep all of the baby’s food, in addition to everything else.
I also made it clear I’m responsible for childcare, but even that feels heavily micromanaged. She made me a Google Doc on how to care for the baby, which I understand to some extent, but combined with everything else it feels very controlling. She’s very strict about wake windows—even when it’s obvious the baby is exhausted—and will question my decisions around that.
She is also extremely strict about bottles and how they’re handled. For example, even after they’ve been run through the bottle washer, they can’t be set on the counter and have to be handled in a very specific way, and I’m frequently told they aren’t clean enough even though I pre-wash them with bottle soap before they go in.
On top of that, there are constant check-ins, and it feels like anytime I sit down while the baby is asleep I’m immediately given another task. We also can’t go on walks alone yet, so I’m essentially always being supervised or directed.
Another big challenge is feeding. The baby has a really hard time focusing on eating unless the room is quiet and no one is in there. However, both parents will often come in during feeds to say hi to her and then leave, which completely distracts her and she gets upset. It makes bottle feeds and especially solids really difficult to complete because she gets worked up and won’t focus on eating afterward. She is constantly fussy every time they check in because they don’t stay long but do it very often. I feel like she gets confused on why they leave, then gets upset. I’m in WA state and make only $28/hr, and I’m starting to feel like the role has shifted into a nanny/household assistant position without that being clearly communicated or reflected in pay.
I have another job lined up but they want me to start ASAP.
Is this unreasonable to quit with a short notice? Its just started to becoming mentally exhausting.
Edit: Some other things I have forgotten to mention, theres been times where I will purposefully leave things to see if they’ll do it. Such as leaving laundry in washer for the weekend , I will come back and it would still be there. Same goes if I leave a dish or a bottle in the sink. I feel like they are constantly just waiting on me to complete things when I get back. They also have told me how they prefer I don’t wipe baby every time, cause it causes baby to “ be more wet”. ( I wipe baby every time)