I (19NB) have been in a relationship with my bf (20M) for 2 years now. Sexual stuff has been an issue for us ever since our first time. We have very different sex drives, and it is starting to get me to feel very bad.
I love him so much and I know he loves me too, but the moment I want to do something with him, everything goes wrong. Either he doesn't want it for the environment we're in or he just doesn't feel like it. I try my very best to not show that I'm upset and continue life as is, but it's getting more and more difficult with time. I feel like something is wrong with me, maybe I'm not hot enough or maybe I just don't know how to make him feel attracted to me in that way. I tried to make less direct requests, but I sincerely don't know if it worked or not. Plus I feel like I'm manipulating him into it when I don't say my real intentions, saying that I wanna make out and getting him excited by it just seems wrong.
He does want it sometimes but he rarely ever asks me to do it, because he senses it is wrong or something like that. If I'm being honest, I can only remember like 2 times in our entire relationship where he started things. I feel like I'm chasing sex like a horny dog everytime I want to do something and he doesn't want to, and I hate that feeling.
I really want to make it work for the both of us without making either uncomfortable. Breaking up with him is NOT an option before anyone says something like that. He is the one I want for life, the only person who gets me, my best friend, the best partner I've ever had in almost every way. I just want to try and make him desire me more in that way, without doing something that feels like manipulation.
Tldr: We have different sex drives and I feel bad about it. I tried talking to him, but we couldn't find a solution. We AREN'T going to break up and I need someone's opinion on what I should do.