u/Front-Look5618

Hey guys! Had our first RPL consultation and was curious if people's were similar?

For context: Me and my partner have been TTC since early 2023; we had a 6 week loss in Jan 2024, a 6 week loss in June 2024, a 6 week loss in October 2025 and a 6.5 week loss in March 2026. All pregnancies were confirmed with urine tests and then a blood HCG. All pregnancies were gone before the 12 week scan offered, so we've never seen them on a scan.

As it took a long time to conceive our third, we paid to do a lot of the standard RPL testing as we didn't want to have to wait for a third loss for our government funded RPL investigations.

So far we've done tons (I won't list them all, but done almost everything except endometrial biopsy.) Some of the ones we've done are sperm analysis and sperm DNA fragmentation (all good - on one of the tests morphology wasn't good but when repeated it was fine.) HyCoSy (fine) APS and lupus (negative), all fertility related hormones for me and him (I have Hashimotos controlled with thyroid meds, everything else normal). Parental karyotyping (normal). Thrombophilia panel (normal). AMH around 18 or 16 pmol/L (tested twice). My vitamin D, iron, B12 all normal. I'm probably missing some, but all normal, except my TPO antibodies (Hashimoto's.)

Just, finally, had our (Portuguese) gov-funded RPL appointment and the fertility doctor was ADAMANT that early losses "don't count" as RPL and was really reluctant to treat us or investigate. I released a lot of very pent up emotions and said, if you don't believe the pregnancies count, please treat us as a couple who have been TTC for four years with no luck. She conceded and has said that they would like a repeat SA and hormonal blood draw from my bf. I will be offered a hysteroscopy (more thorough than a HyCoSy apparently) and an endometrial biopsy. I was also told to take LDA and 5 mg of Prednisolone every day.

I feel like this is pretty thorough, what do you guys reckon? How does this compare to your RPL workup and what is it maybe missing? I mentioned endometriosis to her (my periods have always been HEAVY and v painful and used to get pain during sex - she said to forget endometriosis, it wouldn't be the issue.)

As an aside, I felt really affronted that she said our losses don't count, but I do acknowledge I'm weirdly lucky my losses have not been later. I just don't know what to do to get a pregnancy to progress!

I'm also speaking to a reproductive Immunologist, due to my Hashimotos and elevated TPO antibodies, but I'm super curious to see if LDA and Prednisolone might be enough to get us our dream baby (we were dreaming of three but as he is 42 and I'm 34...not sure if this is realistic!)

How did your guys' RPL workups compare to ours? TIA. Sorry for essay, I can neve keep these short and sweet!

Getting my period plunges me back into despair, not necessarily because I'm not pregnant (we paused TTC after most recent loss so I could get more immune testing done) just the feeling of the cramps and seeing all the blood does something to my brain.

I used to have hella painful periods when I was younger due undiagnosed autoimmune thyroid disease, but after getting on thyroxine, they became less painful and I actually used to embrace them and the quiet, introspective time it brought me.

Now, after four miscarriages, I find that my periods trigger me so, so much and set me back mentally. My mental health can be pretty OK during most of the month, but it will all go to shit during my period. I had a terrible experience with birth control when I was younger, and it made me bleed non-stop, so that's not really an option. I know that I need to work on seeing all the blood and not feeling so traumatised by it. I'm so isolated by this experience and honestly barely speak to anyone about it anymore, with each loss I felt friends pull away a bit. Not understanding why I carry on putting myself through this. My partner is supportive, but a man, so doesn't have the physical experience. I honestly am so stumped as to how to move through this grief. I did some therapy, and will go back to it again when I can...