u/GeeAyeAreElle

I dont know where else to turn but here. My friends are understanding but I feel like im exhausting them. My family basically sucks.

After several months of seperation and living together, I (41F) and him (39M), 20 years of being together, are in the last week. Its had its major downs, and some neutral times. I wouldnt say good ever since the seperation. Hes been seeing someone and is out of the house a lot of the time. We've been strung along by ass dragging lawyers who have taken their sweet time finalizing the legal seperation.

Ive gone through rage, grief, periods of being excited. I secured my own place which I receive the keys to tomorrow. Im not officially moving until August but I can start bringing some stuff over there.

No kids, just pets we are splitting based on who is bonded to who.

But I received my settlement cheque today, the one thing thats been my biggest stress as I need the funds to go through with this. (He is buying me out of the home, its been copasetic and we agreed on a number). Why did I bawl my eyes out in the bank parking lot after depositing it? It just feels so final. Im sure i will feel the same tomorrow after picking my new keys up. I have barely started packing because it just simply doesnt feel real. But knowing I have 1 week left in our home is hitting hard and I just want to crawl into a hole and not deal with anything anymore at this point.

Im so so so tired.

To the girl I viewed an apartment with at the same time this week in Transcona. I just want you to know your kindness when I broke down over my situation held me up in the moment. I really wanted to ask for your number to connect as friends, but I dont even know how to do that at this point. Anyway, if you were the one who awkwardly sat in the parking lot next to me waiting in our cars then assured me everything was going to be ok on our way back to them, thank you. Truly thank you.