Dating a man without kids, I can’t have anymore.
Hello there!
I am scared to put this out into the World Wide Web because people can be horrid.
So I am with a man who is 34 and I am 29. I have four children from a previous marriage. He has warmly welcomed me and my four children into his life. He is a wonderful human being, and we have truly added to each others lives in every aspect. I am so incredibly grateful. However. I had a tubal ligation and an ablation. He was aware of this prior to getting serious, he has always said, “I wrote off having kids of my own a long time ago”. I cant help but feel immense pain for him as I know he truly wants a child of his own. I just had a gyno appointment and they said it’s very unlikely and unsafe for me to have IVF after ablation. I am still going to meet with a fertility specialist because I just have to rule out 100% if I’m unable to carry safely. This has been devastating news for me, and a very big weight for me to carry as it’s more shame than other thing. My boyfriend has reassured me that we knew it could be in the cards to never have children of our own. My question is for those men who have married women with children knowing they can’t have their own. Do you feel empty, do you regret it after a while, do you blame your wife, has it impacted your relationship where you eventually leave?
We have a very strong relationship, we share the same sorrow, but I don’t want it to turn into resentment over the years. I am hoping since my ablation wasn’t that successful in terms of what’s it’s supposed to correct, that I still have a decent lining, but nonetheless it’s been something I can get off my mind. At the end of the day, it will work or it won’t but I just need some other perspectives.