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u/Gil-Gandel

▲ 0 r/Jokes

Baal: whoa, sorry guys, that one was kinda hard work. Maybe not so much hit sauce on the burnt offering next time?

Guys.

Guys?

What just happened???

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u/Gil-Gandel — 13 hours ago
▲ 76 r/Jokes

I still remember the day my friend came staggering out of the bedroom with tears in his eyes. "It's a boy," he cried, "it's a boy!"

Anyway we never went back to Thailand.

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u/Gil-Gandel — 20 hours ago
▲ 418 r/Jokes

I let my car unattended with my accordion on view in the front passenger seat. When I got back, someone had broken into my car

and left another accordion.

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u/Gil-Gandel — 2 days ago
▲ 0 r/Jokes

Mirror, mirror on the wall, who is the fairest one of all?

The mirror sighed, and gave a grunt,

And said "Not you, you ugly creature".

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u/Gil-Gandel — 3 days ago
▲ 109 r/Jokes

Boss: "And remember, there's no 'I' in 'Team'!"

Disgruntled peon: "yeah, and there's not much sign of 'U' in it either".

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u/Gil-Gandel — 7 days ago
▲ 6 r/Jokes

I just saw an advertisement for a Rolex Oyster and I thought "I wish I had enough money to buy one of those"

I don't want a Rolex Oyster, I just wish I had enough money.

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u/Gil-Gandel — 8 days ago
▲ 2 r/Jokes

I've just checked my mailbox and I see I completely forgot about the Lent course on eschatology.

Oh well. It's not the end of the world.

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u/Gil-Gandel — 8 days ago
▲ 33 r/Jokes

When a little Dutch boy sticks his finger in a dyke, he's immortalised in a folk tale.

But I'm not saying another word until my lawyer gets here.

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u/Gil-Gandel — 9 days ago
▲ 55 r/Jokes

He said "I like my girlfriends like I like my whisky: fourteen years old and mixed up with coke".

I was disgusted.

I thought I'd taught him to respect good Scotch.

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u/Gil-Gandel — 23 days ago