u/Glittering_Laugh_958

I will clarify by saying, I don’t think this is an issue with established members here who know what this sub is about, but we have had an influx of comments on posts that say “Hi, Lori!” or “Okay, Jax!” etc. when it is very obvious that the addressed user is NOT really the person they are being addressed as.

This problem has permeated the other Valley and Vanderpump subs and it has become such a problem there that we will not allow it to become an issue here.

We KNOW that Jax and Lori are active on Reddit and have most likely been on our sub. Brittany too. But lazily accusing one another of being a Valley/VPR cast member is doing too much and will now be removed. Same with posts that are directed to cast members directly (“Dear Brittany…” style posts).

if you have proof or a substantiated determination that a certain user account is Jax/Brittany/Lori, you can message the mods and ask for permission to post about it.

Thank you. We’re just trying to keep this community nice.

Hello there,

I’m stuck at home with a double ear infection. Can’t hear the TV so I’m shooting my shot here!

I am the Platonic form of a precocious eldest daughter all grown up. I’m an overeducated overachiever, chronic overthinker, a neurotic perfectionist, high EQ, and the perennial adventurer.

Sometimes I feel as though I have everything and nothing going on simultaneously. I would describe myself as incredibly lucky and cursed all at once. So dramatic, right? I'm a lady of many contradictions. I'm one of those people who have a face that immediately betrays their inner thoughts and feelings, but the words that come from my mouth are a bit more aloof. I'm self-aware to a fault, ever-mindful and overanalyzing anything and everything. But my apparent neurodivergence can make me so lonely at times.

I’m lucky to have an amazing set of friends but sometimes I worry I'm too much of a burden or an intrusion on their lives, so I try to tread lightly. My closest friends would describe me as a hilarious, nurturing magpie with a creative streak. While the world is burning, I surround myself with beautiful things and creature comforts. I try to enrich everything or everyone I touch, directly or indirectly, to make the world a little less shitty or, at least, a little more humorous.

I haven't done any serious dating since early 2020. In many ways, it feels like life ended some time in early 2020 and now we're all in a doomed wormhole snaking its way towards hell. Perhaps I just need more socialization?

My outlook on life can be described as generally apathetic yet spitefully optimistic. My interests are broad and numerous: quilting, native gardening, reading, traveling, foodie things, reality tv, hockey, and vinyl collecting. I also collect head glass.

Lately I’ve become OBSESSED with expanding my jewelry collection. I focus on collecting bespoke pieces from small independent woman jewelers. I've gotten the gold bug and am hoping to expand into gemstone collecting for custom pieces. I’d love to show you my favorite pieces.

Some things that you might find interesting:

\* I aspire to travel more;

\* I’m not religious and I don’t believe;

\* My favorite hockey teams are (in order of preference): the Boston Bruins, the Washington Capitals, and the Colorado Avalanche;

\* I'm a transactional attorney;

\* I'm also going back to law school full time to earn my 5th degree and pursue a new legal specialty;

\* I don’t drink, but I am very 420 friendly;

\* I was diagnosed with ADHD last year and I am still getting used to navigating this diagnosis; and

I’m looking to meet new people, expectations none, to maybe just maybe meet someone somewhere in a meaningful way. I would love to find a hockey friend, a fellow Swiftie, or a gem obsessed magpie. I want to find interesting characters.

I am not currently looking to have voice or video chats or to exchange selfies. Those things are earned with trust and time.

Please be age appropriate. I have nothing meaningful in common with people <30 or >45. Please be appropriate generally, \*if you have crazy NSFW shit in your profile I will not respond.\* I do appreciate signs of life re: profile (i.e., posts and comments) but if you’re posting to niche NSFW subs, we’re probably not going to hit it off.

Also, please write a half way decent, respectful message. Something for my brain to digest other than “hey” or “;).”

Please include your age, sex, and general location so I know something about you.

Adam Lee Decker is a menace to society. He must be stopped at all costs from singing. Like holy shit, that was so bad.

Hello there,

I’m looking for someone. Not sure who exactly, but I know you’re out there.

About me:

I am the Platonic form of a precocious eldest daughter all grown up. I’m an overeducated overachiever, chronic over-thinker, a neurotic perfectionist, high EQ, and the perennial adventurer.

Sometimes I feel as though I have everything and nothing going on simultaneously. I would describe myself as incredibly lucky and cursed all at once. So dramatic, right? I'm a lady of many contradictions. I'm one of those people who have a face that immediately betrays their inner thoughts and feelings, but the words that come from my mouth are a bit more aloof. I'm self-aware to a fault, ever-mindful and overanalyzing anything and everything. But my apparent neurodivergence can make me so lonely at times.

I haven't done any serious dating since early 2020. My longest relationship has been with the Oxford comma. In many ways, it feels like life ended some time in early 2020 and now we're all in a doomed wormhole snaking its way towards hell. Perhaps I just need more socialization?

My outlook on life can be described as generally apathetic yet spitefully optimistic. My interests are broad and numerous: quilting, native gardening, reading, traveling, foodie things, reality tv, hockey, and vinyl collecting. I also collect head glass and bespoke jewelry.

I recently revamped my front yard and am constantly doing little and not-so-little home improvement projects. I live in the Lowcountry of South Carolina, in my old hometown. I **hate** it here and plan on relocating in the near-distant future.

What I bring to the table:

* god-tier pattern recognition;

* direct, straightforward, and reliable reciprocal communication;

* forensic-level over-analysis of micro expressions and body language;

* judicious attention to word choice;

* delicious, succulent home cooked meals;

* structured spontaneity;

* enticing conspiracy theories (ask me how I think we're actually living in "Hell", if "Hell" even exists);

* emotional availability (with the right person);

and much much more!

I’m looking to meet new people, expectations none, to maybe just maybe meet someone somewhere in a meaningful way. I would love to find a hockey friend, a fellow Swiftie, or a gem obsessed magpie. I want to find interesting characters.

**I am not currently looking to have voice or video chats or to exchange selfies. Those things are earned with trust and time.** If you ask/demand any of those things, I will simply stop responding.

Please be age appropriate. I have nothing meaningful in common with people <30 or >45. Please be appropriate generally, *if you have crazy NSFW shit in your profile I will not respond.* I do appreciate signs of life re: profile (i.e., posts and comments) but if you’re posting to niche NSFW subs, we’re probably not going to hit it off.

Also, please write a half way decent, respectful message. Something for my brain to digest other than “hey” or “;).”

Please include your age, sex, and general location so I know something about you.

Hello there,

I’m looking for someone. Not sure who exactly, but I know you’re out there.

About me:

I am the Platonic form of a precocious eldest daughter all grown up. I’m an overeducated overachiever, chronic overthinker, a neurotic perfectionist, high EQ, and the perennial adventurer.

Sometimes I feel as though I have everything and nothing going on simultaneously. I would describe myself as incredibly lucky and cursed all at once. So dramatic, right? I'm a lady of many contradictions. I'm one of those people who have a face that immediately betrays their inner thoughts and feelings, but the words that come from my mouth are a bit more aloof. I'm self-aware to a fault, ever-mindful and overanalyzing anything and everything. But my apparent neurodivergence can make me so lonely at times.

I haven't done any serious dating since early 2020. In many ways, it feels like life ended some time in early 2020 and now we're all in a doomed wormhole snaking its way towards hell. Perhaps I just need more socialization?

My outlook on life can be described as generally apathetic yet spitefully optimistic. My interests are broad and numerous: quilting, native gardening, reading, traveling, foodie things, reality tv, hockey, and vinyl collecting. I also collect head glass and custom jewelry.

What I bring to the table:

* god-tier pattern recognition;

* direct, straightforward, and reliable reciprocal communication;

* forensic-level over-analysis of micro expressions and body language;

* judicious attention to word choice;

* delicious, succulent home cooked meals;

* structured spontaneity;

* enticing conspiracy theories;

* emotional availability (with the right person);

and much much more!

I’m looking to meet new people, expectations none, to maybe just maybe meet someone somewhere in a meaningful way. I would love to find a hockey friend, a fellow Swiftie, or a gem obsessed magpie. I want to find interesting characters.

I am not currently looking to have voice or video chats or to exchange selfies. Those things are earned with trust and time.

Please be age appropriate. I have nothing meaningful in common with people <30 or >45. Please be appropriate generally, \*if you have crazy NSFW shit in your profile I will not respond.\* I do appreciate signs of life re: profile (i.e., posts and comments) but if you’re posting to niche NSFW subs, we’re probably not going to hit it off.

Also, please write a half way decent, respectful message. Something for my brain to digest other than “hey” or “;).”

Please include your age, sex, and general location so I know something about you.