Uganda 🇺🇬 & Rwanda 🇷🇼 - two months in
Two months into my East African trip. TLDR, Uganda HOT, Rwanda NOT. Why'd I go to Rwanda? Got a bunch of friends in Kigali, so why not lol.
Dating app works incredibly well in East Africa as a PPB. They're a wasteland for local guys, but as a PPB, we have options!
- I had been swiping right about 3-5 times out of 10 in Uganda, only 1/10 in Rwanda
- Rwanda is about 4x the price of Uganda for food and maybe 3x the price for accommodations. Not a deal breaker for me because I have a boatload of Rwandan friends
- Rwandan women can be tall, but few are pretty in the face. I had fun with one Rwandan lady as I knew her as friends prior, but I didn't meet any Rwandan ladies from dating app here (no point). Still a great time!
- The two countries are more culturally similar than different. Obviously Ugandan women wear gomas dresses and that remains exclusively within their borders. Ugandans put the meat or fish in the sauce whereas the Rwandans put it on the plate. Rwandans serve food with mayo, salt and hot pepper. Condiments are more "upon request" in Uganda
- Language barrier - travelling on only English is MUCH easier in Uganda than Rwanda. In fact, in Uganda it's the Baganda who struggle the most with English because Luganda is the most widely used local language, but Ugandans of different tribes who don't have a common root language will end up speaking to each other in English. But... travelling on other Western languages in Uganda is basically a dead end. In Rwanda, ALL Rwandans speak Kinyarwanda - meaning they RARELY use English outside of school. Signs are in English everywhere in Rwanda, and they may do web searches in English, but many are even too shy to speak English. Their "switchover" from French to English is somewhat incomplete. Many Rwandans still have a French Christian name, Catholic churches still use French, and many older Rwandans are better in French than English. Knowing French gives you a bump up in Rwanda, but you may rely on a friend who's educated to interpret Kinyarwanda for you. I have NEVER had this issue in Uganda where I needed a friend to interpret a local language for me (only friends would fill me in on what I'd miss in conversation in their language, which is to be expected). In Uganda, even deep in the village, pretty much anyone is ready to talk to you in English
- In Rwanda, there's no burning garbage in the streets (better waste management), street vendors are limited to bus parks (bus "terminals"), and there are no roadside kiosks. In Uganda, there are street vendors everywhere, local guys will come up and talk to you from anywhere (in Rwanda it'll only happen if the guys are very drunk, and that's rare compared to Uganda), and there's street food everywhere. Common street food in Uganda includes what they call a "Rolex" (chiapati which is flatbread rolled with an omelet)
- Customs are not harmonized (yet). Each time you cross borders, you'll have to declare what you have. Immigration and customs was much more organized entering Uganda, but in Rwanda, they didn't seem to know what they were doing (immigration officer repeated the same basic questions multiple times, customs ignored the x-ray machine, went through everyone's bags piece by piece, brought me to secondary for customs and were literally talking nonsense, I called them out and then they let me go). As usual, don't let them intimidate you with their incompetence. At Entebbe airport, I was formerly able to haggle with customs
- Quick pro tip for Rwanda...take $100 USD notes TO Rwanda and leave with smaller USD notes. Rwanda trades $100 notes higher (both buy and sell) than smaller notes. Not the case in Uganda.
Rwandans can be nice people. I have definitely dealt with some drama (not dating related) here, but was otherwise great. Credit cards are widely accepted in Rwanda (Uganda is almost exclusively cash or mobile money only). Crypto is easy to swap in Uganda but basically illegal in Rwanda.
Back to topic regarding the ladies. I'll cover my overall impression of the different tribes. Note that I lack experience with the Lugbara or Nileo-Hamite ladies....Lugbara are an isolated tribe, might as well be the "Basques of East Africa" and the Nilo-Hamites are primarily from the Eastern region.
- Nyankole/Banyankole - they're in both Uganda and Rwanda (obviously many more in Uganda). This is THE MOST FEMININE Bantu tribe in Uganda. If you meet a dime who's Nyankole, you've found a true beauty! Their language is similar to Luganda. Have them teach you some common phrases in their language and you'll be understood in Luganda as well
- Mutooro - Western region. Very beautiful ladies here. Good amount of 8/9/10's. Similar to the Banyankole but somewhat further North (Fort Portal Town is their biggest city...it has a colder climate as it's in the Highlands)
- Muganda/Baganda - majority tribe in the Central region. Many are mixed with Rwandan, boosting their apple bottoms lol. The Baganda are the real "mixed bag" of Uganda. Most of the ugly women in Uganda are Baganda, but...the Baganda have a boatload of 7/8/9's. Dimes may be rare, but 8's and 9's are abundant. If you date one, have her teach you some Luganda (at least the greetings) because this will take you far around Kampala
- Heading North...Acholi - biggest Nilotic tribe of the North. If you date any, try to learn some of their language. They'll look more like the Sudanese as many South Sudanese are also Acholi. There are some real beauties here but...be warned, Acholi people have been heavily relocated and damaged due to wars, LRA, etc. They also get silenced in politics. Among the older Acholi, many suffer disfigurement and trauma. The Gen Z are mostly fine (some grew up in orphanages). If you find an Acholi queen, there's nothing wrong with that. But, before chasing the Acholi, there's the...
- Langi/Lango - sister tribe to the Acholi. Their language is mutually intelligible with Acholi and many even speak Acholi as well (since Acholi music & urban population dominate among the Nilotic languages in Uganda). The Langi haven't suffered the same way as the Acholi. There are tall, beautiful, dark Langi ladies. You can get them in different body types. If you find a Langi who's a dime, you're in good hands. There's also the Alu (a bit more central) who are also Nilotic, but I lack experience and exposure to them
TLDR, if you get a dime who's Nyankole or Langi, you've done well. Other tribes have dimes as well. There's no tribe to 100% avoid, as everything will depend more on the person, and the selection per tribe will heavily depend on the region where you stay. Uganda is cheap (lunch that can feed one or two people for just over $3 USD, guest houses for $17-35 USD per night), you could go to a cheaper destination, but then you're chancing everything else. Skip Rwanda unless you're going for a specific lady (or visiting for other reasons). Ugandans of all tribes reside in Kampala, with the Baganda obviously being the majority. Don't be afraid to travel to remote places in Uganda.
Hope this helps!!