I hate being a lawyer
Haven’t even been practicing a full year and I cannot see myself doing this for the rest of my life. I’m in litigation and despise it. I swear my life is not mine to live anymore. I have no idea how to balance my personal life with my work life because it feels like all I do is work. I regret law school. I regret everything that’s led me here. I passed the bar exam on my first try and I try to remind myself what an accomplishment that is, but I am just so blinded by the hate I have for this profession that I can’t even get myself into that mindset.
I’m also tired of only living for the weekend and the Sunday gloomies that I have to come back to this place. I don’t know if it’s a generational thing, but I can’t work 12 hours a day and see my family and friends for 30 minutes before bedtime. It’s absolutely ridiculous.
I don’t know if I hate the firm I’m at now, if I hate litigation, or if I just hate this profession in general (perhaps a combination of all three). All I know is that it hasn’t been a year and I’m exhausted - I can’t sleep, I don’t eat, my hair is falling out, I’m unhappy.
I’m also tired of the fake sense of urgency “we need this drafted asap” which leads to me working late into the night to finish something that won’t be touched for over a week. So you didn’t really need it asap? You just wanted to ruin my night. Thanks.