u/Glum_Ebb_1642

“Honor your mother, and honor your father” type shit. So what am I? A slave? God forbid! Every lesson is a brainwashing session and I hate how devoted my whole family are to this religion. I just want to be free from their religious beliefs and the religion itself. They’re pretty much “conservative” and they prefer me being simple. That pisses the absolute fuck out of me. See, I don’t do simple, because I have a passion for being grunge and goth in terms of style. But dude they prefer me “blending in” and being “normal”, quote on quote because that’s what they literally told me.

Point is, I hate how the brainwashing sessions make them think elders are more superior than their children. I believe respect is earned. I hate the idea that you have to respect elders even when they’re disrespectful themselves.

I find it tragic that the brainwashing is obvious in the church when, really, I think that love exists in all forms, even when they’re “sanlibutan”. See, most of the boys in my church aren’t good-looking, both in the Philippines AND in America. Options are pretty much limited when it comes to dating as a member. As for their personalities, it varies, from experience. I’ve been hit on by most of them, really. Student ministers (grown ass men who know I’m a minor) tell me that it’s a blessing to marry a future minister like them, because I’ll be even more blessed, which is absolute pedophilia bullshit. Choir members in my church are also toxic— you’ll have to be in their “sweet spot” to make them like you. If you’re a “whore”, they won’t like you. If you’re “too shy or too boring” they’ll find you bland. Let’s be real, they have these high standards when they look like sub-5 incels themselves.

Anyways, I have a boyfriend. A sanlibutan. He’s the only one who can bring me joy even if he lives in Europe. Idk why, but I considered converting him for the sake of staying in the church for my family. But that’s stupid. He’s atheist and I won’t force him too. When i considered converting him, my Iglesia friend was livid. He told me I would get a bad reputation if I marry someone not Iglesia even if I convert him. That’s hypocritical! He even told me it’s best if I just marry someone already in the church. As if. I’d rather die than commit inbreeding and possible incest.