Please pray for me please, it doensnt have to be much.
I'm a young uni student, and i recently stopped my antidepressants (under supervision). Its too late to go back on them as it would make me worse. the withdrawals may last weeks or months im not sure.
Amoung other challenges right now (finding it hard to get a job and other family worries),
im also getting really intense negativite thoughts and self harmful thoughts, as well as lust.
It was and has been especially magnified after i built up a false sense of security a few weeks ago and smoked cannabis, and got into a bad state of paranioa/panic and all of my bad thouhts were x1000. I had to pray and concentrate my way out of it as it was like nothing i felt before (i used to be addicted, now i do it very so often). It was a horrible stupid decision, and i havent felt the same since it happened. i never want to go near it again. I'm trying to keep up my daily prayer but ive been avoiding church and confession since.
I just messaged my priest for confession and a talk as i feel very alone about this. i got my mum and brother to talk to about it who i love very much but i still feel trapped and underwater. as silly as it sounds, i feel like i just need prayers, even from stangers, even though i feel undeserving from my horrible decisions.