Not sure how to help a grieving friend
A friend of mine lost a relative recently and I don’t know how to help them. I don’t really grieve people when they die, I just kind of move on when someone dies, as awful as that sounds. I just feel numb all the time, and I can never name how I feel beyond “numb”, so I just shrug off and feel numb whenever someone around me dies and move on with my life. After all, death is a part of life and there is nothing you can do to reverse the process. No amount of crying or pleading will ever bring a dead person back to life. But, in turn, that means I don’t know how to help people (like my friend) with their grief. Because I don’t understand finding losing a relative upsetting beyond a conceptual level, and beyond understanding that it is how you’re “supposed” to feel.
All I feel I can give is generic condolences and hoping that the things I am saying are the “right” things to say, despite me believing none of it and not truly understanding why they are so upset. I feel like I am lying to them, and that my inability to understand grief makes me some kind of monster. Please tell me I am not the only one here who struggles with this kind of situation, I feel so abnormal for all of this.