A little over a month ago my husband told me about his gambling addiction and significant debt. The last month we’ve been in crisis mode- I put gamban on everything, took over all finances, created and managed a strict budget, and talked to our finance guy to formulate a plan. The debt is in the ballpark of 125,000. There was more taken from retirement and other savings, but our focus is the debt repayment right now. I should add- he’s doing amazing. He’s going to meetings, and scheduling apts with his psychotherapist… he’s putting in the work and says he never wants to go back to where he was. It’s a lot, but day by day he’s doing it.
We both make roughly the same each month and are both lucky that we can work extra. I took over paying for the entire mortgage and more household things so he can focus the bulk of his pay cheque going towards the debt. I decided that I want to try to save 1000-2000 (based around my overtime) a month for my own safety and nest egg incase things go down and I have to leave. I don’t have a ton in my own separate savings or investments. Literally everything for my retirement is under his accounts and he gambled a lot of it away. I’m 36 so I have time to recover- but it’s shit. I’m self employed so I have zero pension, but he does. And yes, I’m kicking myself for relying so heavily on him.
I’ve been told two methods to approach this debt:
A)Let him work on the repayment, and I add in what I feel comfortable while also saving to keep myself feeling safe
B)both of us throw everything we can towards the debt to pay it off faster.
Considering it’s gambling debt and the significant betrayal that comes with this- I’m not sure how I feel about option B. If we focus on only him repaying the debt it could be paid off in 2 years. If I contribute, then obviously less.
Obviously if there is a relapse, I’m out. Which is why I’d like to have a bigger nest egg… I do have cash available to me and a support system, but more is always better.
Any thoughts are appreciated.