u/GroundbreakingBed643

This isnt a question anyone with bipolar can really answer but it is just so baffling to me right now.

My psychiatrist finally prescribed me some medication to deal with my bipolar episodes, looking it up online its described as a antipsychotic but my psychiatrist explained it too me more as a mood stabilizer.

What exactly it is aside, i have been on it for 2 days now and i havent nearly leveld up to the dose I am supposed to be on yet, but i feel so insanely diffrent.

I feel calmer than i ever have in my life, both psychologically and physically. I only really have been able to see how tense I have always been now that im not. My brain feels so much calmer and not in a bad way like when im depressed but its also not constantly filled with that electric impuls.

Im still able to think negatively, but negative thoughts feel so much less consuming. They just come and go and never really impact me much beyond their existence. Also falling asleep and getting tired is much less unpleasant even tho I am tired a lot more but that is one of the side effects ive been warned about.

On the other side this also finally made me understand why its so common for bipolar people to quit their meds. On the one side because I can see how feeling like this would convince you that you will be fine and that you dont need them and on the other side because it feels like I am a diffrent person and the creeping feeling of loosing your personality is definetly somewhere inside me.

I definetly see myself in the shoes of those people at some point and for all intents and purposes I can just hope that im gonna be okay.

A few days ago my depression very suddenly went away and I became hypersexual and unconcerned with s lot of stuff. Went outside and had a massive walk, barely slept, met friends under false pretenses because i wanted to socialise so badly.

But im unsure because ive been spending a lot of time on my phone doing nothing in bed or just engaging with my hypersexual tendencies wich is unusual for me but also I might have given myself slight heat stroke when this kicked i (i generally physically struggle with weather change a lot) and eating food has been repulsive to me and I physically don't have any energy but my mind is going so fast.

Just a little unsure abt this really

Not sure if the Flair is the correct one but as the title says i just wanted to share something more positive. I tend to get stuck in the Negativ aspects and loose sight of everything thats going well so I try to here and there make an effort to look at the good side of things.

Since ive been posting some of the more negative stuff here recently I also wanted to make the time to post something more positive and appreciative.

So here it goes! Despite everything that has been going on recently I am very gratefull for the friends and support system I have managed to build around me. Ive been spending a lot of time with a friend of mine recently and it always makes me feel better, even if hes just hanging around for hours at my place and were jot really doing anything at all. Since he went true a breakup we have been spending a lot of time together and im really gratefull for that (not me being malicious btw ive talked to him about it and he also really appriciates it).

And it feels like the type of friendship where both of us are willing to just be there for the other person. I recently went on a prolonged walk with him when he was haveing a bad time with a dateing situation of his and he is comeing over to my place today just to spend some time with me because i said it helped me with the depression.

Im so gratefull to have that type of friendship and also all my other friends. I have a friend who i can have really serious discussions with and who will call me out on behaviour and its fun and nice and also a friend who called with me yesterday until I fell asleep and I also have a support team around me who I can trust will catch me when I have a bad time so I at the very least stay alive and have the chance to not start back at zero.

Im also greatfull for this subreddit to a certain extend. It had been difficult to get diagnosed as bipolar and not really have anyone around me who understand what it really feels like. Haveing gotten feedback from other bipolar people has been really helpfull even if sometimes I didnt love the responses I got. It was always very honest wich I appriciate immensely.

So yea that was a bit of positivity from me

Basically as the title says. Ive been stuck in bed for about a weel now and I find it hard to see a way out of here. I do relatively okay when im with a friend or someone else but as long as im alone I cant really see any way this is gonna end. I should be going to school and I know that I have to catch up on all the work im missing rn wich is daunting but nothing can really get me out of this.

I met with my therapist yesterday who said he would be calling my psychiatrist today to talk about giving me medication so hopefully that might get me somewhere but I could still use some additional help so if anyone can give me and ideas and advice I would really appriciate it.

I even find it hard to do fun stuff rn, I had to put away video games because I felt too exhausted for them and my eating has also been horrible to the point where i already lost a little weight.