Should I ask my best friend if she wants to be a bridesmaid before doing the whole performance of it?
My best friend of almost 15 years is pregnant with twins (yay!). She’ll be having these twins wayyy before my big day but now she’ll be a mom of two one year olds around the time of my big day. She is my only friend with kids and will be my only friend with kids for my wedding and bridal events. I’m doing bridesmaids proposal boxes of around $250 per bridesmaids worth of gifts and I don’t want her to feel obligated to be a bridesmaid. Should I ask her separately without the big performance of it before asking her with the other bridesmaids.
Edit: I just want to add this post is not about the bridesmaids proposal boxes. It is about how to make my friend who will be postpartum and a new mom feel included and special as well as my other friends. A lot of people are suggesting I save the money to go towards the wedding. The amount of the gift boxes won’t make a dent in wedding plans. I am paying for all of the bachelorette party, their hair and makeup day of, and their hotel rooms the night of the wedding. The only thing I am asking my bridesmaids to buy is their dress if they chose to (there is no strict dress code for bridesmaids). We are a friend group where we gift each other nice gifts and do expensive dinners for birthdays or even just for fun! Again it wasn’t about the bridesmaids proposal boxes.
Edit 2: a lot of people are saying it’s all for Instagram thing or to make “content”. I do not post on Instagram or make content for social media in any way. Gift giving is my love language and I want to make my friends feel special. If they want to post they can although I would actually prefer they do not as I do have a couple friends from college that I am not asking to be apart of the bridal party. So no it’s not about Instagram…
Edit 3: the people have spoken and I will do ask the bridesmaids and do a questionnaire BEFORE I do the boxes! Then I will have people together to give them the boxes.