r/bridesmaids

We're getting married in October. We're a queer couple and both me and my fiance are women and we're having a joint bachelorette. Since **last October**, I've assigned one of my bridesmaids, F, as the person in charge of the bachelorette. My fiance has assigned one of their friends, L, to work with F on the bachelorette that will include planning the event, decor, and transportation. They are also in charge of finding an airbnb (some people are out of town) and managing the schedule. This bachelorette is going to take place in NYC three days before our wedding in another city. My fiancé has booked tickets for the entire wedding group to fly to the other city the day after the bachelorette so we can all travel as a group.

It's now 2 months out from our wedding and other than booking an Airbnb for the event, we've not heard anything from either F or L so we put them in a group chat and asked for an update on their current planning. We've previously set a budget of $3k and we'd like to know whether the budget is enough and whether people are having trouble. F said that she's been looking but a lot of things she thought was cool was not open on a Wednesday. Her and L hasn't had a chance to correspond so nothing is planned. That made my fiancé nervous since it's just 2 months out and we're doing this in NYC. My fiancé is worried that places will get booked fast. My fiancé and I decided that since it seems like our friends are too overwhelmed to plan things, we'll just plan a rough itinerary which involves a strip dance lesson, dinner, then going out to the clubs.

We communicated in the group chat that this is the plan and we'd need their assistance in hammering in the details (like booking transport, setting up decor, making rsvp). F then reveals that even though she lives 2 hours away from NYC, she's not going to stay at the Airbnb they've booked and also she's booked a different flight than the flight we got for our wedding party and will be arriving a day later than all of us. We were surprised to find out that she booked herself a different flight and asked why she did that. She said that after I initially told her that I was having trouble filling the group to satisfy a group rate, she booked a ticket that night because tickets were getting expensive. I apologized for not updating her and I did drop the ball on that but I also was not expecting her to book a different ticket that day without asking me first. I expressed that I would like for her to cancel her ticket and fly with us. My fiancé "strongly suggested" that F stay at the Airbnb because if we're planning on going clubbing we're planning to be out late and living 2 hrs away and not staying at the bnb was not ideal. F then said that it "feels very manipulating and controlling" that my fiancé "strongly suggest" she stay at the bnb and that there's no way she's going out till 4am so she should just exit the wedding party completely. The insult really offended my fiancé and I told F that she should not have said that. F apologized for using the words manipulative and controlling but now the damage is done and my fiancé says it's forgiven but not forgotten. I told F that she should calm down and think on things for a couple of days before making any nuclear decisions such as exiting the wedding party.

Now two days later I circled back to ask what F decided about her involvement to the wedding and she told me that she'll be there to support me during the wedding but will not attend the bachelorette stating that "we need some time to repair and wouldn't want it to be uncomfortable". The bachelorette is 3 days before the wedding so I'm confused what repair could happen in that time. If no repair happens by the bachelorette, no repair would happen by our wedding.

Here are some questions for reddit:

1. I know I can't force people to join bachelorettes and people have the right to not come (because schedule, financial, etc) even though we specifically asked LAST YEAR for people to consider their ability for these things before accepting the role of a bridesmaid. Am I right in feeling a type of way that F is not coming to a bachelorette that she was suppose to plan?
2. Should I remove F from the wedding party completely because I don't see how if "repair" doesn't happen by the bachelorette, that it'd be repaired before the wedding 3 days later.

Edit: It seems like many people are confused about a few things.
- We're not asking people to spend $3k per person. We (the people getting married) are paying for the entire party. We set a budget of $3k and hoped that'd be enough for a a party.
- "Assigned" is probably the wrong word. I "asked" F if she could take this on over a year ago and she said she would. I've also stated plenty of times over the last year that if she's overwhelmed, if this is too much, please let me know and I'll adjust accordingly.
- It seems like many of you are upset that having decor, rsvp dinner, arranging transport (which is a day of party bus from point A to point B) is too much for a bridesmaid. Then what is under the scope of a bridesmaid in terms of the bachelor party? Are you all saying that me and my fiancé should be planning both wedding and bachelorette? We've expressed to our wedding party over a year ago what we expected in terms of time and financial cost and for each person to please consider the ask before they commit. If they can't commit their time/have financial troubles, then be honest they don't have capacity to be in a wedding party and it won't affect our friendship whatsoever.
- We've also not told anyone that they must stay out till a set time. F saying she's not staying out till 4am was a thing she presumed based on what time the club closes, not a thing we've asked.
- to the people who are upset about our destination bachelorette in an expensive city. We know. We live in NYC. It's not destination. We're paying for the entire thing. No wedding party is putting money into this. We're flying the next day to another city for the actual wedding specifically bcoz NYC is very expensive. We've arranged for the group flight and discounted rate.
- the reason the bachelorette is 3 days ahead of the wedding is because we have friends flying in internationally for this. This way they only had to take one trip.

Bride and I were roommates back in college, I introduced her to her fiancé, I helped him coordinate the proposal. We've been quite good friends for a while, so it made sense when she asked me to be her MOH and I happily agreed.

Trouble is, she's bad with money. Perpetual credit card debt, all for FOMO stuff. Nails and hair appointments that cost hundreds. Accepting every invite. Elaborate birthdays or parties. She's not dropping thousands at a pop, but it adds up and the debt keeps growing.

She doesn't get the cost of weddings. She wanted a classic 150 person wedding, photographer and video, DJ, open bar, full catering, beautiful venue for 10k. New York area. Then the guest count dropped and the budget increased to 30k, which is money they still don't have.

Meanwhile, FOMO is taking the reins on her planning. A bach party that pushes the budgets of all the bridesmaids, 6 hour drive away, 3 day weekend because that's what you do. She wanted a dress she could dance in cause she's a big dancer, but was swayed by the princess gown, so now she needs two. She's given out a thousand dollars of cheap trinkets to the bridal party. As the MOH, I've gotten 16 gifts personally.

She's an instagram bride who gets agitated when I bring up cost or practicality, so the scope keeps increasing. The groomsmen need swords and boutonnieres. The bridesmaids need tiaras and lanterns and bouquets. The centerpieces will have greenery and florals and fake candles and fruits. She's giving out favors. She's doing a dessert bar but then decided she also needed a cake. The wedding is in December but she fell in love with the garden space for the ceremony, so now she needs to get blankets and rent heaters so people don't freeze.

The centerpieces and bouquets will be made by the bridal party. And because we don't have an industrial fridge to keep them fresh, we're going to have to do them the day of the rehearsal dinner. The centerpieces have to be done the day of the wedding to keep the fruit fresh (she can't stand bugs). We'll need to assemble the favors. The seating chart will be on us to station and put together.

I don't mind the regular bridesmaids stuff. We'll put together the bach party. I'll coordinate a shower with the wicked witch of the west (her mom). We'll learn a choreographed dance bit. We'll keep the dance floor packed (god I hope this happens naturally and we don't have to pull people on). I'll hold her dress when she has to pee, learn to bustle it, hold her flowers, and fluff her train. I've gone dress shopping and to the bridesmaids brunch she threw before the dress fitting so we could all meet each other. I like this stuff.

But going over all the decor stuff and watching her create this growing mountain of stuff that we'll have to all DIY right before the wedding is stressing me out. I'm not the only one, but she doesn't take well to hearing it from us. And some of us make a chunk more money than she does, so she takes it personally that we think she shouldn't get a traditional wedding. She does all right for herself, but ultimately the debt has stopped her from being able to do anything with her salary for years.

I don't really know what I need. I just need to vent, get it off my chest for a bit.

This is the first time I’ll have been a bridesmaid. This weekend we have the bachelorette party at a casino in-state, with a spa day and such.

I am very nervous because I have been in a very bad place with my mental health this year (was hospitalized a month ago). I find myself backing out of or leaving most social gatherings early. I organized the bridal shower and I even had to leave that for an hour once everything was underway because I was feeling so awful. The bride and one or two of the other bridesmaids know about this.

It’ll be three days away from our hometown, and while I want to be there 100%, I am worried about my ability to do so.

Has anyone else been in a similar situation, and what were your tactics/coping mechanisms for making it through the weekend? I have Ativan I can use, but it may or may not help and I’d rather avoid it if I can.

What is the largest bachelorette party you have been invited to?

I RSVPd yes to a destination and I discovered there are 25 women attending. This is an out of state location for everyone.

24 girls in an Airbnb, out for dinners, calling Ubers, splitting groceries, etc

While of course I don’t have to go, I do want to celebrate my friend! I’m just shocked that there are that many people invited and I can’t imagine this will be a smooth experience. We’d need upwards of 5 Ubers to get anywhere. Just seems like a nightmare

They’ve been together for about 5 years and I’ve never met him. I haven’t lived in the same town as the bride since high school but still!

Hello everyone,

My friend is getting married next year and originally chose three bridesmaids, including me. She picked one very specific bridesmaid dress same brand, same cut, same style — and it costs $300. The issue is that the dress only goes up to a certain size, and one of the bridesmaids we’ll call her “Karla” simply cannot fit into it.

We suggested a compromise: same color, different styles, so everyone could feel comfortable. The bride refused. She said she wanted everyone in the exact same dress because “it’s her wedding.”

Then she ended up dropping Karla entirely because the she “ couldn’t” get the dress on time which would be now and wedding is schedule for next fall/ winter

After that, she changed things again. She told us she wanted to remove hair and makeup from the plan because it was too expensive. Then she switched again and said we don’t need to get our hair done, but we do still need to pay for makeup which lowered the cost, but the whole situation felt chaotic.

The part that bothers me is this: she’s a SAHM, doesn’t make her own income, and I honestly thought she’d be more considerate about the financial side especially toward someone ( Karla) who also doesn’t work and can’t afford a $300 dress as of this moment that doesn’t even come in her size.

I talked to her privately and told her I understand it’s her wedding, but if she knew she wanted a very specific dress, she shouldn’t have asked that girl to be a bridesmaid in the first place. She said she “didn’t know” and “wasn’t thinking at the time.”

One of her friends (not in the bridal party) overheard and said the bride did nothing wrong because “it’s her wedding.” Sure, it is her wedding but morally, how do you justify asking someone to buy a $300 dress they can’t fit into, and then basically telling them they can’t be part of the wedding because of it?

I’m trying to figure out if I’m being unreasonable or if this really is inconsiderate.

My friend (the bride) has two MOH’s. I know them both personally. The bachelorette trip is scheduled for 8 months from now in St. Maarten. I know St. Maarten is a premium destination and I never expected it to be a budget trip, but what happened next is pure insanity.

3 Months Ago: The bride mentioned to me that the MOHs got a quote for the trip that was around $2,700 per person. She asked how I felt about it and I was honest with her. I told the bride directly that $2,700 was a massive amount of money. The bride agreed with me and said she would see if the planners could bring the cost down.

The Last 3 Months: Total radio silence. No group chats were made. No updates were given. Crucially, neither of the MOHs ever asked the bridesmaids what our budgets were. They just planned in a complete silo.

Last week: Realizing the trip is 8 months out and we’ve heard nothing, I texted one of the MOHs for a casual update. She told me they were "done planning" and would be sending out the itinerary and costs shortly.

Today: They drop the bomb in the group chat. They didn't actually plan anything themselves—they outsourced the entire trip to a luxury travel agency ("Luxe Tribes") and passed the inflated bill directly to us.
The text read: "Hi ladies! ... The link attached includes a brief itinerary... We have been working with Luxe Tribes to make it all happen. The link includes a payment portal where you pay your deposit and set your payment plan. The deposit is $150 and must be made by August 21st (ONE WEEK FROM TODAY) to secure the villa. The remaining balance is split into 6 installments..."
The total cost? $2,800.
Not only did they completely ignore my budget warning from three months ago, but the price actually went UP. They kept us entirely in the dark, locked in a luxury package, and are now demanding a deposit on a single week's notice. $2,800 doesn't even include flights, drinks, or tips—this is easily a $4,000 trip when all is said and done.
I feel like they deliberately gatekept the information because they knew it was too expensive and didn't want anyone "ruining" their luxury aesthetic vision before it was locked in. It feels incredibly manipulative to present a done deal and try to corner us into financing a bachelorette party.
IAm I completely justified in being pissed off, or is this just how people plan bachelorettes now?

Edit 1 08/15/26:
I appreciate all of the replies. I didn’t expect this post to gain so much traction. I’ll answer a few questions and address some things I saw.

1.) This isn’t fake/AI, this is real life.

2.) I’m aware I don’t have to go. However, this is a bridesmaids sub and that’s what it’s for. To vent and ask questions. I’m allowed to express myself.

3.) I honestly don’t know if the bride’s portion is included in the $2800. I assume, but I’m NOT 100% sure. Last night was the first time they communicated with us about the trip.

4.) $2,800 includes:
4 nights' stay at a villa in St. Maarten

2x breakfast with a private chef at the villa

Private dinner at the villa (3-course meal), drinks not included

Private Boat trip to St. Barths with snacks and drinks

60 mins In-house massage at your villa

Round-trip transfers from and to the airport

Ground transportation for all scheduled activities

NOT including flight, gratuities, travel insurance, drinks.

5.) Since last night, I’ve been debating on whether I should go or not and I have decided to drop out. I have to admit that I feel guilty since I agreed to the bach trip. I even wonder if I’m overreacting. None of the bridesmaids have replied so I’m guessing they feel the same way. I don’t know them so I won’t ask them. This is someone I have been friends with since 2007, so she’s practically my sister. But I know I need to stand ten toes down. It’s not my job to please anyone. I will send a text to the group chat and give y’all an update later.

Edit 2 08/17/26:
The bride said she understood where I was coming from and was apologetic. I spoke to one of the MOHs today, and she apologized for not communicating and for not asking about a budget. She said, “It slipped their mind.” She agreed that it is expensive, especially since the cost doesn’t include the flight. She admitted that Luxe Tribes did all of the work (obviously).
I also asked if the bride’s portion was included in the $2,800, and she said no. The bride is paying her own way. Kind of strange to me since the bride is usually covered during bach parties/trips.
She said they all want me there, and they’re going to speak with the travel agent to see if the cost can be lowered. Truthfully, I don’t think it’s possible. But I did let her know that if it’s not possible, then it’s okay because I don’t want the bride’s experience to be watered down because of me. Although it’s very expensive, it’s her right to have the bach trip she wants.
It feels good knowing they didn’t give me any backlash about it. I do think it’s a lesson learned for everyone, including me. I don’t know how the other bridesmaids feel because they never replied in the chat. I asked the MOH if she knew, but she doesn’t know either. Thanks for all the feedback!

I was asked to be a bridesmaid in my husband’s little sister’s wedding. When I was asked, I was pregnant with twins and told them that, as much as I love her, I really didn’t want to be in the wedding because I knew being postpartum with twins would make things difficult. I’m also not particularly close with her and am essentially a filler bridesmaid to even out the numbers with the groomsmen. They asked anyway, and I agreed because she’s my husband’s little sister and I wanted to support her.
Now we’re at exactly the problems I was worried about.
The other bridesmaids are all single women around 20–25. I’m currently postpartum with twins, and I look postpartum with twins. 😂 My stomach still looks pregnant, and the dress they chose is terrible on my body. I don’t mean I just dislike it—it genuinely emphasizes my stomach and makes me look pregnant. There is no alteration that will fix it.
My mom is very optimistic and always tells me something looks fine when I’m being too critical, and even she said, “Your body just isn’t made for that style of dress.” So I know I’m not completely imagining it.
The bride’s older sister suggested that she and I wear a different dress together. I appreciate her trying to help, but I really don’t want to do that either. If we’re the only two in different dresses, I feel like it will just highlight that we’re the bigger/older bridesmaids who needed a different dress. I already feel incredibly self-conscious postpartum and don’t want to spend the wedding feeling like the “fat bridesmaid.”
There’s also the fact that I’ve fainted while standing at a wedding before, so I was already uncomfortable with the idea of standing through the ceremony again. That was another reason I didn’t want to be a bridesmaid in the first place.
And logistically, this is a lot. I have a three-year-old son who is the ring bearer, my husband is a groomsman, and I have newborn twins. I’m not even sure who is supposed to take care of my three-year-old while I’m getting ready with the bridesmaids, since my husband will be getting ready with the groomsmen. Then I have to figure out childcare for the twins, too.
So I’m stuck: I can’t wear the original dress, I don’t want to wear a different dress and feel singled out, I don’t want to stand because I’ve fainted before, and the logistics of getting myself and three children to this wedding are overwhelming.
What would you do?
Would you suck it up and wear the original dress? Wear a different dress with the bride’s sister? Or have an honest conversation with the bride and say that this is exactly why I told her I didn’t want to be a bridesmaid, and I don’t think I can realistically do it?
I genuinely want honest opinions, even if I’m being unreasonable.

Currently stressing about how to tell a friend that I don’t want her to be a bridesmaid after initially informally saying she would be.

For context I got engaged in May of 2026. This girl and I have been friends for about 3 years and we haven’t had any falling outs or anything major. She moved away to a different city earlier this year and since we don’t see each other as much, I have started to wonder if we were really close due to proximity or because of our friendship. I don’t want to get too into the nitty gritty of why I don’t feel as close but I don’t feel like she asks me anything about my life or is curious about what is going on for me as of late. Earlier this year in June when I first got engaged, I told her informally that she would be a bridesmaid when she asked who I was thinking. But through the summer and different events and occasions, I’ve started to feel like we really aren’t as close as we once were or thought we were. I want to do a proposer bridesmaid proposal at the end of September but I don’t know how to approach telling her that things have changed. My fiancé only has 5 groomsmen on his side so a part of me wants to just blame it on and also say that with our wedding size (150-180) I want a slightly smaller bridal party. I am really unsure on how to approach this but I don’t want to continue questioning if I made the right decision to have her as a bridesmaid when I don’t feel that close to her.

Unsure if this type of post is allowed or not but I am looking for some advice.

I am 24F and am going to be a bridesmaid for one of my best friends in a month! I am super excited but also a bit nervous- I have never even attended a wedding before, let alone been in one. I am looking for advice specifically about gifts for the bride and groom, but any general advice anyone would like to offer would be appreciated too.

For the gift- I am getting mixed signals as to what exactly I am supposed to get. Some have told me I don't need to get them anything because I am in the wedding party, whereas others have told me I should get something more costly because I am their good friend.

I am, of course, going to be getting them a gift but I am unsure about what the general rule of thumb is for how much I should spend/how much I should buy... it is a small wedding and much of their registry contains household items that remain unpurchased. They are not very material people, and I really doubt that they will be looking into who spent what, but I want to make sure that I give them the appropriate amount of wedding gifts, as I care for them a lot!

I have gotten them something small (less than 50 USD) off of their registry but am looking at an additional gift that is around 200 USD. I was thinking of contributing a bit to their honeymoon fund as well. Is that enough to have spent? Too much? Too little? Any advice/personal experience stories would be helpful. Thanks!

is anyone struggling to order the try before you buy on Azazie right now? I’m a bridesmaid in a wedding, I was looking at a few options and sizes because I’m not exactly sure what I want or how they’ll fit me. I tried FIFTEEN dresses, and none of them were available in my size to try on, and most were not available in ANY size. is this normal? i put in my email to be notified when theyre back for try on in any color, in multiple sizes. Will I actually hear back??

I’m in my cousins wedding. She has chosen very expensive options for her events. Bachelorette trip was planned for a holiday weekend, we all thought it would be perfect since nobody had to take off work. This is until she tells us that the trip will be 4 days instead of 3. Annoying but not impossible, as I expected to take some PTO for the wedding. She then complained the whole time about how expensive and busy the restaurants and town was that we visited, despite not paying a thing. For the Bridal Shower, her mom who threw it told the bridesmaids that there is not pressure to buy a gift as we are already paying to be in the wedding. I bought one since my cousin bought one for my shower when I got married. After the shower, she then complained about the bridesmaids that didn’t get her anything. Now the wedding. She said that makeup and hair is optional and gave us the price. It was expensive but I am willing to pay as I have no idea how to style myself. She just texted us 2 days before the wedding and says “ don’t worry guys, my family will be covering the tip for the makeup and hair people” this annoyed me so much only because I feel like that should be expected!!! You hired the very expensive makeup and hair artists and gave us a price! When I got married I paid for my bridesmaids hair since all of them opted in and only a few wanted makeup done. I never expected anyone to tip the hair or makeup people that I hired. Her wedding is a week day wedding so now I have to take 2 more days of PTO. I have also had to take off work for other wedding related events such as alterations and things like that. Am I crazy to be annoyed that she keeps picking these expensive things and then complaining about then or expecting more money to be shelled out?? This event is getting ridiculous and has cost be over $2000 and a week of PTO.

Im a bridesmaid for someone I went to grad school with and haven't seen in almost 2 years because we live like 3 hours away now and both have full time jobs in our fields with different hours. Dress shopping is the first event for her wedding I'd be attending. This is my first time being a bridesmaid. All the other bridesmaids are going to be there.

Only problem is that last night I felt a tickle in my throat, and woke up today with lots of mucus, congestion, and a sore throat. I feel so guilty about the thought of cancelling especially cause we haven't seen each other in so long. But the bride is immunocompromised and if I go I'd have to drive 3 hours at 7am already feeling sick. I know the answer is to not go but I just feel so guilty about it.

Should I call her or text to let her know? Can I offer to have another bridesmaid facetime me in during the appointment? Should I offer to go anyway and wear a mask?

EDIT: Made an error in the title. We'd be going shopping to find a wedding dress, not a fitting.

Hey everyone! Bridesmaid here, and I'm starting to get anxious about attending the bachelorette party, mostly because I'm worried about the MOH being pissed at me.

Backstory, I've been unemployed since the end of February, and that has caused obvious financial stress. The MOH knows about my situation as does everyone else. When it came time for the bridal shower my MIL graciously helped pay for my portion of what I was responsible for. She insisted on it and it was a great help.

The bachelorette is going to be a weekend in NYC. I know, I know, people will say I could've backed out but the bride is my SIL and I've never been in a bridal party before. My husband is basically paying for me to go and covering my expenses. We are not rich by any means, but are able to afford me attending the weekend. The other night my husband mentioned that when I get back he'll use whatever money is left in the budget to get his suit for the wedding. This made me so sad, because he should not have to cheap out on a suit so I can get $30 cocktails.

The MOH sent everyone the itinerary the other night and I got very nervous. For the past few months I was told more than once by her and the bride that as far as food goes it would be low key like pizza, chinese take out, and possibly one sit down restaurant. The MOH even asked me for a list of recs, and I figured she might use some, she might not use any. She booked two reservations for dinner and brunch and it's way more than I was expecting. After looking on here for advice and talking to a close friend I decided to reach out and ask her what the expectations were for paying for the bride during the trip.

She told me the bride will be paying for her own things and it's going to be an expensive enough trip and that NYC is a hard city to keep costs down and she definitely had affordability in mind. (To me $30 plates plus drinks, tax, and tip is way more than splitting a pizza.) I told her since I had been expecting more low key options that I wanted to be upfront and let her know I can only afford to pay for myself during the weekend.

MOH sent me a massive text and seemed agitated with me, saying the bride deserves a nice, planned bachelorette and that she worked for hours on the itinerary to make it as affordable as possible and doesn't understand where my hesitancy is coming from especially since I sent her a list of cocktail bars. (The bars are on the itinerary in a list format - it's highly unlikely we are going to every single one.) She again said that it is not expected I pay for anything for the bride.

I told her I just wanted clarification on the expectations and wanted to be upfront with her about my financial situation. That I wasn't trying to get out of paying for anything or making a dig at her itinerary because it is a great plan. She seemed to be fine after this message saying she didn't think that and assumed everyone including the bride is budgeting for the trip and said she was looking forward to it.

Maybe we just have different communication styles, but now I'm worried that on the trip my spending is going to be put under a microscope - like if I don't get drinks at dinner, or keep it light at the bars she's going to say something. She also wants us to download an app to split the checks and after looking into it's many one star reviews I don't feel comfortable giving out my info to an app I'm only going to use for three days. Apparently there's a paywall to it as well so I don't know. Should I just not think about it and do my own thing and enjoy myself?

Okay so my best friend is getting married and I’m the MOH for her wedding. She’s having the wedding in February in Northwestern North Carolina. She wants bridesmaids in chiffon dresses in some shade of light or pale purple.

I have Raynaud’s disease, aka I lose circulation in my extremities in the cold. Not ideal for a wedding where I will be handling things all day.

Granted the wedding itself will be indoors, but I am not sure how good the heating will be at this venue because it’s a farm style venue. And photos will definitely be outside.

Any advice for a dress that can keep me warm in the winter but is made of chiffon??

So I’m having my sisters as my bridesmaids but I want to pick one of my family members who I would consider my sister. We are similar in age and speak everyday, I have always had it in my head she will be my bridesmaid. I even made her a bridesmaid proposal box (I haven’t asked anyone yet as waiting for the right time). Some background is that at my engagement party she left early because she had a Rave that was arranged prior to my engagement party being arranged. It did annoy me a bit but I had to bring myself back down to earth because it was a prior arrangement. She didn’t get me a card or anything to say congratulations, If it was me in her position I would have cancelled my rave and obviously got her a card. Her boyfriend is an idiot and I have told her he will not be coming to my wedding, and I will never associate myself with him again. She is close to one of my other family members who I don’t really get along with. We have been through a lot together and I have really had her back with situations. I want her there with me but I kind of feel like I’m not as appreciated to her, as she is to me. I’m nervous in case over time she gets annoyed with me because I hate her bf and maybe she drifts from me and I don’t want to look back on my wedding thinking I should have just went with my gut and picked my sisters. I think she will expecting that I pick her so it’s a bit difficult. (Ps I will never let him come between our relationship on my side but I don’t know how she will take it if for example in the future I don’t attend their wedding if it was to happen)

Any advice would be much appreciated!

I’m in my friends wedding in a few weeks. My husband and I found out a few days ago that we are now expecting and I am pregnant! We are super happy. I’ll be 9 weeks by the time the wedding rolls around. I’ve made a few posts about the fact that the lead up to this wedding has been a little challenging. There’s 3 days of events leading up to the actual wedding itself. All of which will include alcohol. I’m one of the maid of honors in this wedding. Should I tell her before? I was thinking of not telling her, but me not drinking at anything will be pretty obvious. I do want her to know as we are best friends and I may need some slight accommodations to the wedding plans. Thoughts ?