Why is BDD not treated as seriously as it should be?
Every time I bring it up, it's dismissed as vanity, insecurity, "teenage things". Therapists don't get it, psychologists don't get it, my friends don't get it, my family doesn't get it. Nobody gets it but some of you. And i'm deeply sorry that you do.
I'm not a teenager anymore, I turned 20 this week. BDD has driven me genuinely to the point of INSANITY. I've isolated myself so much my family hates me, my friends are all gone or i dont like the remaining ones because i refused to talk to them. I can barely focus on hobbies because i think about looks all the time.
I want to die every single time I look at myself. I look hideous and don't consider myself human. I'm not just saying that, I mean it. I do not see a point in my existence anymore and am trying to find ways to end it which aren't painful. I actually dont understand how I look the way I do, no one looks like me or even remotely similar to me. I'm a whole different piece of trash.
And even after telling my psychologist all this, she doesn't get it. She'll say I need a detox from the internet, "people will always have something negative to say", "choose happiness" But the thing is I don't want to be happy, I JUST want to be pretty. Accepting myself won't make my giant nose bigger, or my sticking out pointy chin any smaller. A break from the internet doesnt fix it, i've tried, it's just in my head. No one tells me im that ugly, I just know they think it, so her advice is rubbish.
If I cant afford surgery in the next 3 years i'm done. I'm working 5 days a week, alongside school, to try save for this.