My Mom’s abusive mother passed and I don’t know how to be there for her
Hello, my Mom’s extremely narcissistic mother passed away after a two year long bout of dementia. My mom had cut contact when I was 14 (I’m 25), however, we experienced a major loss in our family 3 years ago and she tentatively got back in contact with her. However, a year after that her dementia began. My mom felt some kind of obligation to care for her, and she did the best she could with how things are.
We finally were able to find her a care facility a few months ago, but a few days ago she got a call she was close to passing. My mom was teary eyed as she left and drove the few hours there while I stayed home and helped watch her dogs. She passed the night she came down, and since coming back you’d think it was just another day.
I’ve made sure she knows that I’m here for her, but she’s assured me that she’s fine. I believe her, I knew she hated her mom but I’ve seen how the years of dementia have affected her so I know her feelings are complicated. I don’t want to impose myself on her and I know to give her space, but I just feel so emotionally distant because I am not at all able to understand how she feels.
I’m not sure what specific advice I’m looking for, but any perspectives on what you would want from your support network in this situation would be greatly appreciated. Thank you all in advance <3