u/Gwhiz64

Title sounds harsh, but I don't know how else to put it 😭 Hi there! I've answered to a few model calls as a model. Always went along with the photographer and did collaborative work, and gave my input when asked. But now as I'm growing my business and have specific styled sessions I'm wanting to do, I've put out a few model calls.

My biggest thing, and I know it's the people pleaser in me, is saying no to people or telling them what they are after would be a paid session. I don't even know how to bring it up. I mention in my post that I have very specific looks and aesthetics I'm trying to achieve, but I get a bunch of people in my DMs asking for their vision.

Ex. "Model calls open! I'm looking for highly stylized portraits in a studio, with very specific imagery."

DM: "Hi! I'm so down for the model call. I would love to do something of the opposite aesthetic, out in nature."

Me: "Thank you for reaching out! I would love to make that come to life for you, but this free session is more for this type of look and for me to experiment. I would be happy to do a paid shoot, though!"

I just feel so scummy. And of course I'm always willing to adjust for accessibility and take artistic suggestions. At the end of the day, they are still helping me out tremendously and I want them to be happy with their results. But when I put an advertisement saying I'm looking for models for a witchy, tarot themed shoot and I get a bunch of DMs asking for family portraits, it does make me a tad annoyed. And I feel like it's wrong of me to be annoyed. And I want to take on things that I'm passionate about, and family photography just isn't my style anymore.

Idk, I need to sleep 😅

It was a dove gray base like before, but the micro shimmer was iridescent/multichrome pink/blue/green with scattered holo. It was very pretty lol.

There, I said it. The reflective glitters in Ride or Diamond make it look dull unless it's under flash. It could have at least had those gorgeous big holo flakes.

- signed a miffed April baby who's too broke up pick up any polish.

As a side note, if anybody wants Ride or Diamond and would be willing to trade for Chandelier Showers hmu

Basically what the title says 😅 I have been terrified to have sex since surgery. I was cleared at 12 weeks but didn't feel ready at all. I've been wanting to for 3 months now and tonight finally did. My husband has been very understanding and we took it at a very painstakingly slow pace, used lots of lube even though I didn't think I needed it, lots of foreplay, etc etc. I also have been doing pelvic floor therapy exercises for the last 3 months.

Had some stinging right at the opening and it overall felt weird, but not really bad? I had a good time, but it definitely felt different than before. There was one instance where my husband moved his leg (I was on top) and it shifted things in a bad way. The pain felt similar to when my cervix would be hit before but only lasted two seconds before going away. It took a long time to relax myself and I had to keep reminding myself to keep my pelvic floor muscles soft lol. I had issues with keeping the muscles too tight before and it got worse after surgery.

Anyway, afterwards I felt fine. I showered and went to rest. About two hours afterwards, I noticed some bloating and gas. It's not painful really, more just uncomfortable. If I pass gas, I feel better momentarily then it comes back. Has anybody had this? Is it anything to be concerned about?

It's worth mentioning they found endo during surgery and I had excision surgery at the same time. I had some adhesions of my colon to my abdominal wall that was carefully removed. I wonder if that has anything to do with it? I had a total, so only my ovaries are left.

I've just been so scared. I've not seen any bleeding. I've not felt heaviness or bulging in my vaginal canal or anything. Just toots lol. I feel silly for being scared to have gas but it seems like it's slowly building up. My tummy feels soft when I press on it though. Anytime I pass gas it doesn't feel like enough. I'm trying to sleep but I'm anxious. Will update later tomorrow. Any advice or kind words would be gratefully appreciated. I know the internet can't tell me for certain whether or not I'm okay, but if anybody else has had similar experiences I'd like to hear I'm not alone. And hopefully that it ended up being nothing to worry about.