i met my boyfriend when we were 15 and now we are both 29. we were not together all those years, we spent some time apart and honestly, looking back, that did wonders for our relationship.
currently i work for my mom’s stationary company. i don’t love it, in fact i hate it. so because of that i have always toyed with the idea of my partner and i starting our own business instead. he’s been unemployed for 2 years now. though he has always been into stock trading, so for now i would say that’s his main source of “income”. which if you ask me is SO unreliable especially with everything happening in the world.
several times i’ve tried setting up businesses but he would seem so uninterested and say it isn’t the right time but really is there a right time for anything?** and lately what bugs me is i’ll watch dynamics of other couples, say on youtube, and i realize how common it is among them that one is the dreamer and one is the doer. and like because of that, things happen for them and there’s momentum. where as i feel like i’m stuck since i’m both the dreamer and the do-er? if that makes sense.
i’ve been overthinking this for several days now and i’m just really at a lost, am i being too critical? is he just scared of taking a big risk or is he simply not ambitious?
don’t get me wrong though, he is my BESTFRIEND. really, if you were to put aside everything i stated above, he is the greenest of green flags. the sweetest, most considerate, loving, respectful, has a lovely family, is practical with money, street smart i would say, he supports my interests and i’m talking would actively be at a bts concert with me cheering and all, very caring towards animals (we’re pet lovers), he’s a good person overall. and i do feel lucky. but as someone who aspires for a lot and has BIG dreams, i really can’t help but be disappointed at his lack of determination and ability to want a lot for himself.
would very much appreciate some insight if you think that gap in our mentality is only a phase or maybe there’s someone who had to go through something similar maybe you could share your stories? and how you dealt with it?
** i anticipate most of you could say it’s his money therefore he has the right to be skeptical about going into business, BUT i’ve told him several times that I could even shoulder the capital alone if that would make him more willing to. that’s just how much i want something of our own. because you really don’t know if you never try. if you can’t already tell our mentality towards it is at opposite ends of the spectrum. sigh
tl;dr - i am disappointed at my boyfriend of 10 years’s inability to dream a little bigger and get out of his comfort zone. is this just a phase or?