u/Happy-3926

I‘ve experienced lovebombing once before (a guy flew out to see me after speaking very briefly, future faking, gifts, asking if I loved him in the first month, telling me I’m special and not like other women, very intense etc) and since then the people have spoken to have been on the opposite end of the spectrum (leaving me on read, breadcrumbing, slow replies and eventual ghosting).

Currently I am speaking to someone who seems to not be either of those things, he seems calm and considerate, intentional but at the back of my mind I wonder how can someone be so nice and respectful and wonder whether it will turn into lovebombing.

I guess my question is, how do I weed out things like lovebombing quickly? And how can I distinguish it from someone who is being nice and genuine?

How are the girlies who know they get super attached during the talking phase surviving? I’ve been burnt a few times because of this and I plan to do things differently going forward. I’m starting with not saving the guys contact number in my phone and avoiding daily communication. Face to face meet ups with my mahram and scheduled phone calls in between should more than suffice because the aim is not to get attached, the aim is to establish alignment and compatibility.

Please share your advice and tips! 💕

I‘m curious - have your requirements become less strict the older you get? Or is there an expectation that because you have waited this long you would like someone that ticks all the boxes?

There are some questions that I shy away from asking during a talking stage e.g does the person watch porn? What is their salary? Past relationships etc

What’s a good way to broach these awkward topics? I end up leaving things late or avoid bringing them up altogether then I end up with doubts at the back of my mind.