I cant tell anyone about the intrusive thoughts I keep getting.
Just to clarify, yes these are actual intrusive thoughts.
I have no idea what could be causing it as Im only diagnosed with ADHD and Im currently working on getting diagnosed for bipolar disorder.
But anyways, I have been getting intrusive thoughts that I cant stand, like harming myself or other people and I would never do anything to hurt someone willingly so I have no idea why I have been experiencing these. I sometimes get thoughts that go against all my core beliefs and it makes me feel like Im a bad person, sometimes my brain will have unwanted racist, sexist, homophobic or other horrible thoughts or judgement towards other neurodivergent people despite the fact that I myself am part of the lgbt community and I myself am Neurodivergent.
Am I a bad person? I would never act out or say any of these unwanted thoughts out loud as I dont believe any of them but I constantly feel like Im an inherently bad person trying to convince myself Im not one because of these thoughts.
I just needed to get this out there but I think telling someone in person that "I regularly think of harming people or animals even though I dont want to act on it and infact hate violence as a whole". I think I might have an investigation opened on me because what normal person thinks things they dont believe. I know Im not normal but thats what makes this so difficult. Its been eating away at me for so long now.
If anyone has similar experiences, if you are comfortable with it could you maybe help me with ways to get rid of it or just make it less so it doesnt scare me so much.