AITH 40 years ago my 55F son 41M was taken away from me. Now we reconnected and he invited me for dinner but I said no
I had my son at a very early age. He was literally pulled from my arms when he was 11 months old. I tried to take care of him and protecting him I didn't know what happened to him. They used to tell me they hurt him just to hurt me or told me they will do it if I don't do as they say. The father of my baby was the guy who was to blame for that experience that lasted years. He was 42 at the time.
I was saved but dealing with complex issues. So I didn't get out of that word and later turned to dancing. It was years later that an NGO found me and they not only helped me get a normal and safe job (janitor) but also helped me find my son. Fortunately after decades of now knowing where he was I found him. Those people after taking him from me gave him to social workers.
He made it! He is something like a vice president of a big company, has a great reputation, I googled everything about him, he gave financial interviews. I mean he is not a superstar or millionaire but still he is doing great. He is 41 now, married too.
I reached out and he rejected me and kept rejecting me and blaming me for everything(he knew my story, but still was in very much pain. He was very arrogant with me). But somehow he reached out by himself one day, he texted me and said he is willing to meet and asked me what I want to eat, adding its on him. I am a very simple woman and I never had any lunch at any restaurant. So I suggested we just go for a walk.
Its been weeks since then and we met a couple more times. I am so proud of him although I didn't contribute to that. He is tall and handsome and said he swims 3 times a week to keep in good shape. And has my blue eyes.
He told me though that he is not a nice person and can be kind of a jerk with subalterns and doesn't tolerate mistakes and has a short temper. He cried at our third meeting and said how much he suffered in state's care and how he was asau Ited and would be crying out for me when he was 5, how he draw hearts and suns for me and I never showed up as other mothers did.
I know he has every reason to be angry with me but our relationship is getting better. But I feel he is giving me way too much. He wants to buy me a flat and gave me a gift and wants me to come and meet his wife (they don't have kids). I am not at their level, they are both very ... upper class. I don't want to be an intruder, I am happy to see him whenever he has some time for me. I was never there for him. His wife was also in the system, they met as kids. So I said no to family dinner and I feel so so bad, like I abandoned him again