is this something you should tell your partner?
(Plz dont drop dumb comments before reading and understanding the post)
i’m a 23F , and i’d genuinely like to hear both mature men’s and women’s perspectives on this.
i’ve struggled with porn addiction and masturbation. i’ve been actively working on it because i don’t want it controlling my life or becoming part of my future relationship. i managed to go about 3-5 months without relapsing, then eventually slipped again. i’m not looking for excuses or sympathy i’m just being honest about where i am.
i also have a high libido, but i know those are two different things. having a high sex drive doesn’t automatically mean someone has an addiction, and having urges doesn’t remove personal responsibility.
and no, i don’t think marriage is a cure for it. i don’t want a partner to “fix” me, and i don’t expect marriage to magically make the problem disappear. i want to work on myself regardless of whether i’m single or in a relationship.
what i’m actually wondering about is honesty.
if you were seriously dating a woman and she told you that she had struggled with porn addiction and masturbation in the past, would it change how you saw her?
would you want to know before marriage, even if she was actively working on it and it wasn’t interfering with the relationship? or would you consider something this personal part of her private history?
i’m not asking whether porn addiction is healthy or unhealthy. i already know why i’m trying to leave it behind. i’m asking about how a mature partner would perceive the person, not just the behavior.
i’d especially like to hear from people who have been in serious, long-term relationships, because i’m asking about how this would actually affect a relationship, not just what people think about it in theory.
if someone you loved trusted you enough to tell you this about her past, would it affect your respect, attraction, or trust toward her? and would you want to know?