u/Healing3012

#Healing

Met a man in the office. Travelled together for almost a year. He knew what kind of a woman I was. Approached me with marriage intentions. After a few discussions and rantings we discussed this with our families. Our kundli didn't match. Thought we could stay friends. He was aware that we are in friendship terms. A few days ago we had a fight. He blamed me for cheating. He checked my maps history and screen time. I was fed up. I couldn't take it anymore and yelled at him and said a few things out of anger.

He was hurt. Not sure if it was because I yelled or something else. A few days later we spoke again as I was suffering from high fever and there was no one to help me. So I reached out to him. As he checked my phone, I checked his and came to know that he is speaking to a woman and planning to get married to her. I confronted him but he said there was nothing happening. Even then he started bringing up my past and checked my phone thoroughly. Installed god knows what app to dig through my deleted photos and started asking some weird questions about the time when he was not Even in my life. Things got heated up. He blamed me saying that I didn't tell him about my past.

Truth is- I told him several times that nothing happened in my past. But he never believed me. He kept bringing up the past that I never wanted to hear.

He got all sad and hurt and asked me to tell everything about my past. I told him everything with tears in my eyes. But in reality - he didn't believe it. But all I said was truth. He kept asking me all things through the night. At one point he said- I want to feel better if I'm leaving you. So tell me something that will make me feel better.

So I started making up for things about my past. I told him the way he wanted to hear. I made up things just to make him feel better. And he kept saying - I know you didn't do all those things. But still didn't believe me ever.

I cried and cried and cried till there was nothing left.

I couldn't bear that he stopped talking to me. I reached out to him again when I was with my family. All I kept thinking about was him. But he did answer my calls. I was devastated. I couldn't bear it. It felt like there is nothing left for me anymore.

I couldn't eat or sleep. He was all over my thoughts.

I just wanted to hear his voice, hug him tight hold him . But he didn't respond. I called him again yesterday as it was unbearable to me. He said he was feeling the same.

I wanted to ask him a lot of things. But never asked. Just asked him one thing - if you don't want to speak to me just tell me, inform me so that I'm will be aware not to come back.

You know what he replied after a day- Please leave me like this. After the confusion you gave me my heart is broken and please don't think that I will blackmail you with your privates.

I felt shocked. All I ever wanted was to talk to him like before. But he never understood me. Now I feel like I don't have to prove myself to someone who has never believed anything I said.