Please excuse me if my thoughts are a bit messed up and me sharing some details in general. I may be anxiously attached to my avoidant.

I am 24m and she is 20f. We met in a students dorm and we have been together for 1,5 years, it was a good time. Our first relationships, first intimacy etc
Things I noticed
- she didn’t like to talk about herself that much
- no hobbies but wanted to work all the time
- couldn’t spend money on herself at all
- intimacy was kind of always initiated by me
- when she felt criticized mood went south quickly
- she screamed extremely loud when she felt criticized or generally if something was very stressful, when she was stressed she aggressively walked in her room back and forth
- her parents show not a lot of love and it looks like they only cared about her grades in school, not saying they are terrible but they felt emotionally not present
- was not able to cook for me due to being scared of being criticized by me or herself

Now, during a more stressful time due to work and studies she started to become anxious about stuff , she was not able to meet me for time and emotional reasons and then after some time she left me, we met one final time for a week, was really painful but also good, crying, sex, you name it. She said the main reason she needs to break up is because her head and mind is not right + we had a long distance relationship, she wanted to be sure about how the future looks like, problems wouldn’t exist if I was from her country and was able to speak it fluently (for some reason that was important she wanted me to have the skill to tell jokes in her language etc, i was learning it but yea)

She regretted the break up 1 week later, but for same said reasons it had to stay like that. She went to some sort of therapy, but she didn’t mention a specific reason and I only know it was like 10x max. We had good contact for 2 months, she even applied for a university in my country next to my hometown. Everything was looking like we could figure it out. Then 1 tiny thing upset her for no reason, chats went dry we were in no contact for 1 month. Now I broke it since I heard she contacted an old friend she swore not to text so I thought maybe she is afraid to text me. I was right. She will go to this university next to my hometown, but is not planning to get back into a relationship or anyone, „for now“. She doesn’t know where she will work in the future so she doesn’t want to commit to not have the same result as last time. She told me at times she felt like I pressured her emotionally and she wants to fully focus on her studies and career. We could meet up, but with no expectations whatsoever. She misses me, but her mental health is importantly.She said our priorities and ways of life are different as I am spontaneous, study and have a small business, but she likes it straight forward with study career etc since that’s easier to follow and plan. But she respects what I do.

Now, she will start her studies in 2 months. It was my first relationship for me and her, the thought of her getting together with someone else is extremely painful, especially if it’s just casual dating (she never did that and doesn’t seem to be that type but who knows)

I also am the kind of person who chooses someone and sticks with this person, I hate dating and I really wanted to live my life with her. Giving all the context, what do you guys think should I do?

Realistically, does this have a future or not? I am working on myself right now and I am also in contact with someone from BetterHelp since it’s a painful experience for me, but does anyone have some experience or thoughts they want to share? Thanks in advance :)