Any insights are welcomed D:
Did the questionnaire.
LOGIC:
Q: Do you find that truth and understanding of systems in life are an important aspect that should be highly valued? How do you usually go about learning and forming an understanding of a concept?
A: Well I trust my own logic heavily, but also everything can be flexible. For concepts, when I come across a new one I automatically think, form opinions & theories inside my mind, then learn about the concept but there isn't much time between the two actions- sometimes they happen at the same time. For systems, I mostly don't care about systems that other people have set up, they don't interest me as I tend to form my own and follow that with as much freedom as possible.
Q: How easily do you find yourself changing opinions or viewpoints? What sorts of things can influence your views the most/least?
A: If something is logical, sure. It's normally me that is doing the changing of opinions of other people, but if I were to change my mind, it would require some good reasoning with every possible aspect considered carefully. I dislike when people try to convince me with emotional manipulation, it doesn't work and just pisses me off lol.
Q: Are you more likely to assume that you’re right or wrong about an issue? Is it important for you to always be right? How easy is it for you to admit it when you’re wrong?
A: I think about what's right and wrong and try to be the right one, but if I'm not, I don't act as I am right, I just tell them something along the lines; "I know I'm probably wrong but __ makes me think/feel __. Maybe I need to try working on that.". I can admit I'm wrong if I see that I am, but if I don't see that I will continue to make sure the other party understands why I'm thinking what I'm thinking. It doesn't have much to do with being right or wrong cuz that could change, but I really care about being objective and consider both logical and emotional aspects and more. The importance for that comes from my personal values (like not being evil I guess).
Q: How do you react when someone disagrees with you during a logical debate? How do you go about defending your beliefs, if at all? Do these types of situations make you doubt your views easily?
A: Usually, I act like I'm calmly dealing with it but I still feel an internal panic that I have to keep in control. If the other person is using edgy remarks it'll be hard to stay calm though and I may get a little toxic by that point because I hate when people just can't discuss things properly without putting a show for others. I don't like to talk about some of my beliefs with other people because they won't understand every connection I make and everything I feel/think about that just as I won't understand theirs- and a couple more reasons. If they ask, I can talk about less personal beliefs. My views on some things aren't that changeable and some may be changeable.
Q: How do you feel about debating logical chains and evidence? (Can discussions and debates help you sort your thoughts out, or are you more likely to see them as unnecessary? Do you find debates more stressful or fun?)
A: This extremely depends on situations and topics- I can give very different answers based on those so I guess it's healthier to just not.
Q: Do you feel the need to explain your own logical understanding to others? Do you feel the need to have others explain their understandings to you?
A: Yes & yes, but if I don't care about the topic I might not.
VOLITION:
Q: Do you consider yourself to be a naturally motivated person? What helps motivate you? Do you need others to motivate you and/or provide incentives for you to work?
A: I have big (and sometimes unrealistic) dreams that I hold dear but I struggle with discipline. My motivation is shaky and I sometimes hate myself for it but it's less about me and more about the ridiculous systems that devalues my work. Since I'm an artist and it's my job I need people to appreciate my creations so I can live, but I struggle with putting time to what I feel passionate about and then I get depressed about it. To really create stuff, I just need inspiration and that could come from literally anywhere. People usually can't motivate me by talking with me because peptalks don't work for me. If a friend wants to do collaborative stuff I'd be happy and motivated, but if they don't show their enthusiasm with words+actions then the project would fade away for me over time.
Q: Are you someone who has a clear sense of direction and purpose? Is this something that matters to you? What do you gain a sense of meaning from?
A: Most of the time yes but sometimes I feel extremely lost and weird. I don't need a purpose though because I don't believe that everyone has purposes for being alive, I just need direction & I won't accept anything that is not my choice. I actually had to accept a direction I didn't want for the first time in my life when I was trying to get into a college because my high school teachers wanted me go through the safe path instead of the rocky one that I wanted, and scared me into taking the safe road which led me into a massive depression and other issues+cost me 10 years of my life SO yeah. It triggers me when someone tries to push their own beliefs and will onto me, and I act harshly. A meaning is what I make out of something.
Q: How is your relationship with goals? Do you often share them with others (or help others with their goals)? Are you self-assured in what you set out to do, or are you more indecisive and/or easily persuaded by what others around you want?
A: I pick my goals myself, but because of some bad stuff about being mocked all my childhood I'm ususally stuck before following them due to fear.
Q: Are you bothered by failures and setbacks? How do you deal with them when they come up?
A: Failures big yes, I can't stand failures and they affect me deeply. Setbacks no, I'll hyperfocus on the problem until I solve it.
Q: Are you someone who easily competes for things you truly desire? How do you feel about others telling you what to do, or trying to insert their desires into yours?
A: I like light competitions for 'spots' but not physical things. I'm extremely individualistic about desires so I won't accept other people's and I won't force mine. The whole forcing thing seems really weird to me too why do I care if it's about someone else's life. If they say they need suggestions I'll gladly list stuff though.
Q: How do you tend to act when you are part of a team? Are you more of a leader or a follower (or neither)? Do you have an easy time working cooperatively with others?
A: I hate being on teams, I'm very quiet and reserved if I'm not with my friends but if it's just between friends I'll gladly be the leader. Following is fun too, but leading is much more entertaining for me and I can be good at it which I discovered very late (I had severe social anxiety but I have literally none rn).
Q: Do you consider yourself to be someone with a firm sense of identity? How do you feel when other people assert their ideas about who you are?
A: I am what I am and I might not be some other day, it doesn't really matter, because whatever I do I'll still be myself- that's my belief at least. And yeah it annoys me when people tell me I'm something when I'm not actually that, but I'll just tell them I'm not ___ I'm ___. The tone will depend on their behaviors.
PHYSICS:
Q: How important are factors such as clothing, hygiene, and appearance to your everyday life? Do you feel confident in your body and tastes? Are you often swayed by trends and the opinions of others in terms of fashion and aesthetics?
A: Hygiene VERY, clothing and appearance are also important but if I won't see anyone important to me that day I don't care that much. I feel very confident in my tastes, but not so much in the body. My fashion and aesthetic senses are also determined by me only, couldn't care less about what's trendy or not. That's not to say I just wear whatever though, I just like to form my own thoughts on every single thing possible.
Q: How do you handle your senses being disturbed? Are you sensitive to problems like discomfort, sickness, and pain? (Or are you unaware/able to push past them/etc..)
A: I'm too sensitive to physical world thus I don't go out much, it's too uncomfortable. I'll be angry and stressed and maybe panicked, it affects me too much and I can't really deal with it unless I have a way to block it.
Q: How is your relationship with physical activity? Are you someone who naturally desires a more comfortable and inert lifestyle, or do you have a hard time staying still? Do you find external encouragement and incentives for taking care of your body useful?
A: I love dancing, it makes me feel alive, but I'm not living my ideal life rn so it's hard to do physical stuff when I don't have motivation. I like other physical activities as well but I'm not obsessed with them, I just like the feeling it gives and the concept of motion. I can stay still for some time but there's a limit and if it is passed it'll be difficult to contain myself. External encouragements work for me on this, those ironic GOOD MORNING CHAMPION GO RIP THE DAY OFF videos make me feel motivated bc 1: they're so funny 2: they're right, I can rip the day off
Q: Do you enjoy pushing yourself to try new foods, activities, or styles? How picky are you regarding these things, and what helps you decide what you want to explore?
A: YES I love trying out new food/drinks, I don't get the same thing twice if there's something I want to try there. Activities and styles depends though as I'm very picky about some stuff (vegetarian and don't like some veggies) but other than those I'm open to try.
Q: How is your relationship with your physical environment? Are you usually attuned to your surroundings? Is being organized something that matters to you and/or comes naturally? How do you feel when another person enters your space and tries to help you with it? (e.g. by cleaning)
A: I'm attuned to my physical environment and have good reflexes but also am kind of clumsy. Organizing can be relaxing but only if it's fully my environment. If not, different things come into play. Also I have OCD so I hate when other people touch my belongings. I don't like getting unrequired help with anything in life and this is no exception.
Q: How do you handle your finances and possessions? Is this an area of ease in your life, or do you find yourself becoming overly reckless or stingy? Do you consider yourself to be a materialistic person?
A: I store them I guess? I need advices on finance stuff like saving and investing bc I know I'm supposed to do stuff but it's so boring. I spend money on things I want to have or gift others, but I make sure I have more than enough to keep my comfort.
Q: How do you react to criticism or advice regarding how you handle any of the above things?
A: I get sad but I know I can get better if I try so the sadness fades easily.
EMOTIONS:
Q: Does self-expression come naturally to you? What emotions do you find easier or harder to express? What goals do you have when dealing with your levels of emotional expression, if any?
A: Only to people who seem like they have the potential to understand. I look very emotionless and aloof to most people but I feel things an extreme amount, I just don't want to show it because it feels vulnerable and intrusive- emotions are special & fragile. For my close ones though I'm energetic and generally have a positive vibe. With 'expressing difficulty', it doesn't exactly have to do with emotions because I don't try to hide them from my close circle, the difficulty comes from explaining the reasons- I don't want to be a burden and I don't want to be misunderstood therefore it gets overwhelming trying to explain my feelings- especially when it's someone who didn't understand them before. Sometimes I try to express myself through art but my art isn't tied to my emotions so it's not that often. Goals-wise about this, I just wanna be understood I guess? Not all the time and definitely not by everyone though.
Q: Are you someone who is in touch with their inner emotional world? Are you good at understanding how you feel about something and why? Do you find others’ insight into how you are/should be feeling beneficial?
A: My inner world and I go hand in hand. I'm good at understanding my feelings bc I instantly can get the 'whys' but I don't always accept them so I see some as faults in creation and try to destroy them. Others' insight on how I should be feeling would anger me and I would make sure they know that with using my words and logic- I'm not afraid of getting into arguments and often start them myself. Although I try to control this nowadays since I don't like anger and being seen as an angry person.
Q: How good are you at balancing your focus between your own emotions and the emotions of others? Are you more naturally attuned to others’ feelings and reactions, or to your own?
A: I can understand others' emotions really well and often help my close ones with those. Others' intense emotions affect my well-being too, it becomes especially suffocating if I'm in the same physical environment as them when that happens. I like taking emotions seriously and find ways to work with them, so when others need it I can also provide insight.
Q: How easily caught up on specific feelings do you become? Do you value being able to detach yourself from your emotions? (And is this something you’re good at?)
A: Pretty easily because I let myself feel things. I learned to shut my emotions down when I was in high school due to some trauma and not wanting to feel afterwards, so if someone who I don't value on a personal level shows emotion in a certain way or something that harms me continues harming me and I 100% can't do anything about it, I can just choose not to feel something (if the emotions are too intense it gets more difficult to do so). I opened back my emotions during college bc I realized they're fun and pretty so I let myself feel things now. I just don't express them outwardly to most people.
Q: How do you normally react when someone shares their emotions with you? Do you enjoy handling situations like these?
A: I listen with attention and ask questions, also ask if they need solutions or just want me to listen & talk about it, and act according to those. If it's a close person, I believe I can handle it really well. It not, then it'll be difficult and I have to tread with extreme caution since I don't know that person. But most people who aren't close to me won't just tell me about their emotions anyway since I look like I have a total of 0 emotions.
Q: When others are speaking on topics regarding emotion, are you more inclined to express, engage, or pull away? Do you adjust to emotional atmospheres, or do you feel more separate from them? How comfortable are you with conversations focused on emotional vulnerability?
A: Usually just watch. I love observing so I'll just gather data about people. I don't do anything to emotional atmospheres if it's about a group, and if I don't like the atmosphere I just leave, but if it's about a person that is close to me then yeah I'll try to make them feel better by talking them about their issues and stuff. Emotional vulnerability is dangerous but I might talk it with people if I trust them enough (rarely ever happens).