Is this even worth it?
I got sober 1 year and 9 months ago. I was heavily using H for over a decade. I put in the work to get and stay sober after basically being given no other choice by my husband. But after the pink cloud cleared, I realized I was getting more and more miserable each day. Every day is the same shit, and I'm so damn close to breaking and fucking it all away. And what's worse is the constant anger and attitude I have towards my husband because I feel resentment towards him. I constantly feel like such a bitch. For context, I'm a 38-year-old F, married for about 16 years now, and my husband is retired, so we're basically always together, which is part of the problem. He literally never wants to do anything, and we only have one car, so I'm dependent on him to go anywhere or do anything. We don't even have sex anymore. I'm bored out of my fucking mind, I'm tired of being stuck in this damn house, and I'm sick of feeling like I'm the only one who's unhappy with things the way they currently are. The only good thing that's come from being sober is that I have saved our family money. But aside from that, I hate it. I feel like I'm losing my damn mind. I thought our relationship would get better after getting sober, but it only opened my eyes to the fact that it's dead. Thanks for letting me vent. Sorry I'm all over the place.