If I make a promise with sincere intention to keep it, but later change my mind, does that constitute breaking a precept or creating negative karma?
For example, I promise my partner that I will clean the bathroom today. At the time, I genuinely intend to do it, but later I become tired and decide not to.
Would this be considered breaking a precept or otherwise morally wrong?
I have watch a ton of videos of the teachig of Hillside. I have a lot of faith in Ajahn teaching. I have try my best to avoid sensuality. I know that it is beginning of the path. Unless one can keep 8 precepts there is no further development on Dhamma. I didnt manage to quit sensual desire yet but I try to keep it at minimum.
Yesterday we found out that my mother got ovariaon cancer. I am experiencing a lot of suffering. I know that I should't try to manage the suffering. I should endure it as Ajahn said. But I can't find a way out of this pain. I still rely on sensuality to cope with this pain. I know its just a distraction. But I dont have no where else to go to. I shouldnt use method like watching nostril or watching sensation to calm my self down either.
What is your advice in situation like this?
I figure the best answer might be something like "just endure it". But I really can't right now. I'm not that skillfull yet.
Thank you