i need to know whether ending my relationship of 2 and a half years is the right thing to do 18m and 18f
i 18M and my girlfriend 18F have been together since november 2023, so two and a half years now. at the time we were both 15 and it was honestly amazing at first. we first broke up in may 2024 based on me feeling like i wasnt happy in that relationship, now this was during our gcses so it was kind of a dick move of me now that i look back as it did take a toll on her mental health even though we had only been together a couple months. fast forward a month and i realise i do want to be with her (yes i know i was a dick again) so we get back together.
again at first it was very exciting but of course not all relationships are perfect, we have had our moments, but one thing was constantly recurring in our arguments. this was that i didnt feel like she was really that bothered about us being together. she tended to spend loads of time with her friends, and would go through patches of seeing me quite a lot then barely twice a week, so i spoke to her about it and she of course doesn’t believe this is the case and that she cares about me and loves me etc. but it gets to a point where all i want to do is see her, so only seeing her this often is really not making me feel too great. i speak to her about it again and i am on the verge of breaking up with her, until i realise its not what i want because i do genuinely love her. after this i see her quite often for about 2 weeks then its the exact same thing again. this cycle has now repeated 3 or 4 times, and every time i try to talk to her about it she just shuts me down and kind of makes me out to seem like im being dramatic.
currently we are doing our a levels, and we had a massive argument the other day because ive seen her twice in the last two weeks and she said she would stay at mine on sunday, but then had to cancel because her friend is breaking up with her boyfriend so she was going to stay at my girlfriends instead. on this day she really disrespected my family, for reasons that i cant really say on here, so my parents now feel different about her.
i told her i couldnt do it anymore on sunday night, its now tuesday night and we havent spoke to each other. i dont want to lose her, but i feel like if i keep repeating this cycle which is making me feel like shit constantly, i am just not going to be happy, and i shouldnt be feeling like this in a relationship especially at 18. i just feel like i cant talk to her anymore because she immediately gets defensive about it, and she doesnt really ever seem bothered about trying to see me until she knows that im upset. i understand that this is a different, more immature situation comparing to some others on here, and ive definitely missed some details out, so feel free to ask any questions. i just need to know whether ending it now is going to be the best option for me in the long run?