I live for other people's happiness
So hey... for a while now I have been noticing, although I'm sure it was always there I just didn't care until now, that I live for others. It's not like I don't want to live anymore and I keep livimg because of others, it's that my life revolves around other people how they treat me and think about me. It is really tiresome that my main concerns is always if other people like me or not, then what I like about myself and what brings me pleasure. My happiest moments are when people hug me and treat me like I'm worth the while, I can't seem like them the normal way, I seem to idolatrize them and then when they don't reply for whatever reason I feel so sad and disappointed and think the worse already and it distabilizes me so much that I can't do any other stuff right I feel like.
For the longest time I hadn't any friends, now that I have some they all just seem one bad day way from hating me, but I need them to validate me, to see me, to make my life feel is worth living, but at the same is tiresome and I know is really unhealthy and I can't keep living like this.
Do anyone have any advice please?