u/HopeDry

I have misophonia. I would get scared and cover my ears whenever my mom would cough (she had a smoker's cough that was really loud). She would get upset and chased me around the house coughing at me as I was panicking. To this day, I get startle reactions at coughing. Any time someone coughs I jump out of my skin and feel anxiety. I never told anyone because I was so ashamed of this problem and it has stayed with me all these years and I am 33 now. How can I heal from this?

I've lived in my current home for 6 years. Never had an issue with pests the way I do now. I do have a cat who makes it harder because even though I try to clean up after his meals he sometimes leaves bits of food everywhere which draws the ants.

I have three trails of fire ants that are covering my whole apartment. I think the ants have built nests inside the walls because I have 3 trails coming out of the baseboards in my bedroom under my bed, in the cracks in the tile in my bathroom, and another trail under my sink in a hole next to the dishwasher. I bought some Terro liquid ant baits and put them in every room a week ago, and they are still here.

On Tuesday I put a work order in for pest control to come out, and they sent the regular maintenance man who told me pest control cannot spray because it is not safe for my cat. He took pictures of the trail of ants and said he had never seen anything like it before. He told me to buy some bleach and spray them with it because ants hate the smell. I don't think spraying the ants with bleach is going to fix this because they are EVERYWHERE.

I have to wear winter boots with socks in my home all day and have to march in place when I am cooking food in my kitchen so ants don't bite my feet. My poor cat is getting chewed up and he has to sit on the toilet seat to prevent from getting bit.

I have tried regular ant baits, Terro ant baits, white vinegar sprayed on their trails, vacuuming--nothing is working. I feel anxious everyday and am overwhelmed by ants.

Is there anything I can try that I have not done yet?

To preface, I am a cis-female who is 100% heterosexual. I met a lovely guy on Facebook dating in March and he is bisexual. I am the first female he has ever dated. His past relationships have all been with men. That didn't bother me.

His story basically is, before coming to Christ, he was very deep in the "gay scene" and lived in a Gayborhood with his fiancé. He was seeing dudes who were into some weird crap like Satanism and Wicca and he got suckered into some of it. He started feeling convicted and gave his life to God three years ago and started going to church and tried to put his past behind him, including having relationships with men.

He has shared with me that he still struggles with having desires and thoughts about his old life. He wants to get rid of them and be a straight Christian male. I can only imagine how difficult it must be, having to go against what your heart naturally wants because you are scared of going to hell. It causes him lot of mental anguish and I don't know how to help him.

Two nights ago, he told me an ex from his past had reached out to him via text message and apologized. The message made him anxious and conflicted because he wanted to respond but he wasn't sure if it was a wise choice because he is dating me currently. He spent several hours praying and distracting himself because he was greatly upset by it. He felt ashamed and like he had betrayed me. He still experiences old desires for intimacy with other men and feels really ashamed for having those feelings.

He ended up deleting the text message and the person's number. He said he doesn't want anything to hurt me or our relationship. He kept apologizing over and over even though he did nothing wrong.

This absolutely breaks my heart. Because I am starting to see he is trying hard to fight his homosexuality because he believes it is wrong and will send him to hell. He takes me to his church with him on Sundays, and it is a white man church with a lot of conservative views. I imagine he is facing a lot of internal conflict and shame.

I am not sure what I can do to help. I want no party to being part of this guy's shame spiral of believing he is going to hell if he is not attracted to women and can't get rid of his old desires. I don't believe being gay is something you can change. I am not sure what his take is on it.

What should I do? Am I seeing this the correct way? I am sad seeing him in so much turmoil.

I have been having really intense sexual feelings and thoughts about my boyfriend and I've only been seeing him for 3 months. Every time I wake up I'm having sexual feelings and thoughts and it's hard to brush them aside. I feel extremely guilty and dirty for it. I'm scared God will punish me for it. I'm a virgin and waiting until marriage to have sex so I think that doesn't help much either. Is there anything I can do to reduce my sex drive or get rid of the sexual thoughts?

I'm 32 female and have been seeing a guy for almost two months. We are getting on very well and I enjoy getting to know him. He is a Christian too and takes me to church with him every Sunday. He is very sweet and I feel safe around him. This is my first "real" relationship (my first was an online long distance relationship) and so I am learning a lot of things along the way.

I am very attracted to him both physically and emotionally, I think. It's still too early to say I love him but ever since last week I have started to really struggle with my thoughts. Every morning I have really sexually charged thoughts involving him and being half-asleep I tend to entertain them until I fully wake up and can pray for forgiveness. I feel guilty about it because I don't want to do anything that would cause God to distance Himself from me, and I also do not want to disrespect this guy in my heart by lusting after him.

How would you handle this?