Hi all,
I hope I can make this make sense, it mostly just makes me sad. Not sure this is the right place so direction on where else to post will be appreciated.
I (26F) have been with my partner (26M) for almost 4 years. The relationship has been good, and I love him very much, but I've hit a point where that love no longer feels romantic.
Our sex life has dried, I feel like we've hit the old married couple feeling really fast, and for as long as I could I tried to be okay with that because he does still mean so much to me. We get along great, have a lot in common and a lot of our "philosophies of life" as I've heard them called align well. But I've had repeated conversations with him about romantic efforts, and feeling undesired, and communication regarding that, and I've realized after this many years I'm past the point of trying for more. It has left me feeling empty and regretful, like I haven't experienced enough yet and this is it, and ive come to the conclusion that thats not fair to either of us and its time to move on.
There's more to it than just that, but thats the gist of it. I don’t want advice on if we should break up - i already know that I want to and will, and if I hadn't come to that decision now it would've come later. My main issue is we have a lease together. It ends September, but requires 60-90 days notice for a change in renewal. I cant stand the idea of waiting until the end of the lease to end things because then I would feel like im lying to him. I also dont know how to bring this up while we're living together because we would need to remain living together throughout.
I know this will absolutely break his heart, and the idea of having the conversation and continuing to live together feels like it would be terrible for him. I dont think breaking lease is an option for us either. What would yall do in this situation? Is looking for the most painless route even worth it? I feel like this is gonna be terrible regardless of what I do but I feel like I have to say something soon.