Hi. I don't believe I've ever written a post in this sub before.
I fully believe in the Lord. I'd like to say I have my own relationship with Him, as do we all. No singular relationship with the Lord is the same as the other's.
Anyhow, I'm currently 23
I got pregnant at 18 and gave birth to my son at 19
I'd always wanted children, mainly younger as I've always been one to be so anxious and worried about fertility.
Throughout this whole pregnancy I prayed and prayed for the Lord to protect my baby and keep him safe and alive. And oh my did He do just that. My son was born perfectly, safely, smoothly and calmly. I couldn't of asked the Lord for a better supported birth
I've now found out I'm pregnant again (23) only about 3-4 weeks pregnant so especially early days. I'm so scared and anxious of baby not progressing (missed miscarriage as these are usually asymptomatic), or if baby is healthy, I'm just scared of raising 2 children
My son will be 4 in June and he is such a blessing, I cannot see life without him and I feel in this day and age where almost everything is made to harm us, it's such a privilege and bless t to be able to conceive
Luckily, my sons dad is dad to the new baby but Me and his dad aren't actually together. We met in 2020, got pregnant in 2021, had our son in 2022.
We've had multiple breakups (about 5/6) but for some reason we keep going back to each-other. obviously we have had intercourse to result in this pregnancy however I was on 2 methods of contraception and still got pregnant (he realises he should have also wrapped up too)
I guess what I'm asking for is any advice? Any prayers I can pray or if anyone can pray me me that would be great, my names Miranda :)
I love being a mummy and I see life, in any form as such a blessing. Termination has never been something I've agreed with and never been something I think I'd be able to go through with, especially given how sacred I feel life is, but I can't help but feel like a terrible mum.
6m after my son was born I had to go back into work (30hrs a week) this resulted in my mum looking after my son (his dad really struggled and wasn't much help at all, we should've supported eachother more) so much tha my son wasn't bonding with me, he didn't want to come back home with me, he wasn't developing properly. It wasn't until I went off sick in work and came out of work completely that we've bonded and for example, his speech and adapting to new settings has improved drastically since I've been home and spending more time with him
I've been trying to find a job around my current availability (I don't want to rely on my mum much as she likes to throw things in my face and I relied on her way too much last time) but I've no luck. I just feel like a failure. At the moment it's just my income and I get about £200 per month from my son's dad. I cannot drive, I've been looking for work that fits around my son in nursery since November, but no luck
People judge people who have abortions (I've been one of them) but people also judge parents having kids that they can't afford or look after
If I ever had to have an abortion, I genuinely think I'd be traumatised no matter the kind of abortion, and if I can't support physically or financially (because people judge this too) 2 kids then isn't it best to give baby up for adoption? But then I'd always wonder
I'm just scared. I want this baby even given my circumstances. But I really don't know how I'll support 2 physically and financially, especially when my son is in full time school in September and if pregnancy goes to plan I'll be due around January. Idk how I'm going to get the bus for 7.51 with a fresh newborn
I'm sorry. Please don't judge. I'm just asking for advice. I'm not close to my mum Since she's been with her new boyfriend. I have 0 friends at all, nor a partner so very alone with all these feelings and events which makes this all even more isolating :(