u/Hot-Conversation-517

I’ve been out socially to close friends and school for years. But the thing is that I’m closeted with my folks. I love my parents. I do. But I don’t think they’d love me as me. As a man. Masc. whatever. I prefer masc pronouns but I’m of the generation of us who had not do great role models and sometimes I feel not trans enough for being unable to medically transition due to being in the closet and health reasons.

On the one hand, I’m reliant on them. So even if I wanted to? I can’t come out to them. I’d be homeless. The job hunt sucks. I’ve been unemployed since 2025, not for lack of trying. Not only that but they’re reliant on me in turn due to family stuff id rather not spill online.

Tonight, I almost told them. Cause my mom said how lucky she was to have raised such a lovely young woman and I just. I felt sick. But I just grinned a beater it cause what rise do I do? End up on the streets? Lose everything I’ve worked so hard for (including my degree, which is so so important to me that I finish)?

Sometimes I just feel like those characters, the ones who are villainized for not coming out, who are seen as awful cause they’re not brave enough. I’m tired of feeling like I’m awful for that. I’m tired of being angry at myself for protecting myself. I’m tired of feeling like the bad guy in my own story, for my real life not having that perfect queer storyline like it does on TV.