AIW for not getting my significant other a mothers day gift?
To start, I (26M) have been with my (26F) gf for almost 6 years now. We dont have any kids, just some dogs and cats. She's talked about wanting kids in the future, but we've not gotten to that point in our lives yet.
This mothers day, we went out with 8 other family members on both sides for a mother's day brunch. We bought flowers for all the women (regardless if they are mothers or not) because my gf doesn't want anyone to feel left out. It didnt really matter to me either way, but I guess it kind of feels weird saying happy mother's day to someone just because they're female.
Anyway, its a great time and since I invited everyone, I paid the entire tab. Some tried to fight, but I stood firm and paid for everything. I budgeted out weeks ago, and was totally fine with doing so. Everyone seems like they had a good time, including gf.
We get back home and the rest of the day is normal. We are each doing our own things and towards the end of the night it becomes clear that she's upset but won't say why. After prying for what felt like a solid 15 minutes, she said she's disappointed that I didnt do anything for her for mothers day. I said I was confused as I figured brunch was something significant enough.
Apparently, since I didnt get her anything specifically different from everyone else, she feels I overlooked her and "dont care".
First of all, not a mother.
I really dont get the weird fascination with getting mothers day stuff if you dont have kids. She said that I know how important it is to her to be a mother one day, and that I clearly dont view her as someone capable of being a good mother. I told her she's way overreaching and that I just didnt think to get something for her on a day specifically curated towards mothers.
In the end, I end up apologizing and telling her to take all the time and space she needs to feel her feelings, and that if there's anything I can do in the next day or two to make her feel better, to let her know. Somehow this didnt sit right with her either and now im in the doghouse.
How did I end up in this spot? Am I wrong for anything I said or did? Or lack thereof?
Edit: Thanks all so much for the replies. To answer a lot of common questions...
We are NOT trying to conceive and have not up to this point.
She has never tried to conceive with a any past relationship so the ability to conceive is unknown.
The very first father's day we spent together, she did get me some candy or something but I told her I was confused and didnt see the point and she hasn't done it since.
I have since posting this tried to calmly talk with her and rescind my previous apology, not in a way that says "I dont care about how you feel" sorta way, but in an "I think the healthiest thing to do is for me to be honest and not pander to how youre acting in order for us to be better quicker" kinda way.
.... it did not go well.
I was asked why I felt that it was okay to "dictate how she feels" and asked to provide specific examples of how she was manipulative.
I just ended the conversation with "I just think its important for the betterment of the future of our relationship if I do a better job being honest about how I feel rather than meaninglessly apologizing".
I will more than likely sleep on the couch tonight and be given the cold shoulder for at least all of tomorrow.