Mono anxiety
Hi, I got diagnosed with mono about 2 months ago now and I don’t think I’ve ever been this depressed in my life. It’s destroying me I’m 21 and am so scared to give it to anyone or to tell anyone (I’ve only told a couple close friends) because I feel so dirty. I can’t explain it but I feel like something has been taken from me and I feel scared to actually live, I would literally rather hermit and disassociate from everyone. I’m a really big sharer of drinks and things with my friends and I’m struggling to adjust, I’m so insanely paranoid now. I just feel like I can’t do this, I don’t know how to approach dating again, not sharing drinks, and not that I do but if I wanted to kiss a stranger or something in a club I don’t think I could do it out of guilt and anxiety. I guess I’m just asking does it get better? Can anyone help me figure out how to live with this and not feel like my existence is an inconvenience, I’m really trying but it’s taken over my life. Have you made meaningful connections since mono? Do people judge you? Literally anything would help at this point I just feel so isolated and alone in this.