Update: I’ve made my mind up about this and believe the residual feelings I have after talking with him about it are just jealousy that this girl might still have his hoodie. Because ultimately I trust what his explanation is and the fact he told me shows awareness of how it could be perceived. Thanks for everyones responses I appreciate the time you took to read and respond.
It was a group party. He didn’t come home that night as they all partied into the morning. I’m okay with that. He told me he walked around town for 6 hours with this girl and her twin brother, it was fun. I’m okay with that. He gave this girl one of his hoodies, in this case one he wears daily and one that was a gift from my family, because she was cold. He told me from the getgo something like “I want to tell you this so you don’t think anything weird by it, but I have her my hoodie because she was cold and didn’t get it back before everyone went home. I hope you understand I was just being nice”. I reacted strongly to this because I wear his hoodies sometimes to smell him when he’s away. They are sentimental to me. I said this with a tone that was higher and my heart was racing, so it was obvious I felt strongly. He reacted to my reaction with frustration because it was innocent and feels I am overreacting. Its just a hoodie. I think that if he were sober that night he’d have realized that giving her the hoodie, when the party was hosted at her mother’s house, was tone deaf at best.
As stated we have talked about this but I am still struggling with feelings about it because he has this girls number and this girl is around regularly nearly every week when he goes to drink with his best friend and that group.
Am I looking too much into this could there be more going on that hes in denial about? I dont think he lied but I still feel a boundary was crossed and im worried more could be in the future. I generally trust him but this situation has me alert.
Thank you.
Edit: he said he wasnt wearing the hoodie when he gave it to her and agrees that if he had been it would have been inappropriate. He elaborated by stating it was in his car and since they were outside he just grabbed it for her. He said he told her to keep the hoodie as it is just a hoodie to him and he wont give clothing away anymore.