14 months
My partner has not kissed me for over 14 months now . We haven’t had sex for even longer . I’m not sure what to do . We have kids and our relationship is purely practical now ( I think she wants that) . I definitely don’t. She is on HRT and seeing a hippy therapist she likes . Through therapy she has discovered the following : she thinks there is a mother/son dynamic going on (me being the son) as she feels as though she looks after everything . I honestly think now we are quite equal , but there was a period in the relationship when she took on the vast majority of childcare etc ; however I was struggling with mental health problems - depression /ocd etc .
She says she wants to try a period of continued non intimacy while I try and be more aware of her and things that need doing . I think I could improve in this department , but I think I treat her well currently . She does have a tendency to take over and not ask for help .
She is definitely going through peri ( she had a really tearful period , then a v horny period and now this period! ) . She has also completely changed the way she looks , spends hrs on her appearance and has started socialising way more . Which is all good but the lack of intimacy /care for me hurts and I’m not sure what to do .
Any advice ? Anyone one else in a similar situation. Mine feels v complex ; there is def some resentment in terms of the amount of childcare she had to do . The other complexity was at the time she really wanted kids , I wasn’t ready , but she said she would take on the bulk of the childcare and if I didn’t give her kids she would leave . I wanted kids with her at some point so I went along with it but I really wasn’t ready and I think it made my mental health worse . Don’t get me wrong I love my kids and they think I’m a great dad but it was hard for me for various reasons .
Thoughts ?