AIO for thinking my bf is being controlling?
I (25F) have been with my bf (30M) for about 8 months now.
I occasionally go out with friends to clubs for girls nights, on girls trips, birthdays, etc.
All of my friends are in long term relationships and we genuinely just go to dance and have fun with each other.
My bf knew this when we first met.
Recently one of my friends wanted to plan a girls trip to Miami, and things blew up.
He said he was uncomfortable with me going to places that are strictly for partying, and he doesn’t want to date someone who goes to clubs.
He said if I went that would be a deal breaker for him.
When we first met he also told me he had a huge boundary about his partner going on cruises.
I thought that was pretty odd but he said he’s witnessed a lot of cheating on cruises.
I’m going on 2 cruises this year that were booked prior to us becoming official.
One is with family and one is a girls trip.
He said he has no problem with the family one, but the girls trip one he has an issue with.
He had a hard time with it at first but accepted it. But he said moving forward he’s not okay with me going on more in the future without him.
My best friend brought up doing a conjoined bachelor/bachelorette cruise for her wedding.
Significant others are invited, but my bf said if that wasn’t the case he wouldn’t be okay with me going because it was a cruise and “I’d be staying with other men.”
He doesn’t have a problem with girls trips or going to bars, etc, it’s just cruises and clubs because of the environment.
He’s been cheated on multiple times in his past, and has admitted he’s insecure and has trust issues.
I understand that, and I understand his boundaries, but I feel like I’m almost being punished and controlled for things other woman have done to him.
I told him I would compromise by not going on trips specifically to party, but that was it.
I understand relationships are about compromise, but I feel like if he trusts me this shouldn’t me a problem.
AIO?
Edit: He isn’t telling me “you’re not allowed to do ___”
He’s saying “these are my boundaries and if you do ____ it would be a dealbreaker”
Just wanted to add because of a few comments!