AITA for wanting a heads up before my husband shared accommodation with a coworker?
My husband regularly travels interstate for work and stays away for several days at a time. After the first few trips, he started booking Airbnb apartments with a female colleague to save money/convenience.
The issue for me wasn’t really the accommodation itself — it was that he never mentioned it beforehand. I only found out after it had already become a regular arrangement.
When I brought it up, I was careful to say I wasn’t accusing him of cheating or asking permission rights over his work travel. I just said I would have appreciated a heads up or check-in beforehand because I think most partners would want transparency about repeatedly sharing accommodation with someone else.
He got extremely angry and said it was offensive that I even expected him to mention it. He accused me of being jealous, insecure, and controlling. He also insisted this kind of arrangement is completely normal for people who travel for work and that nobody checks with their spouse about it.
Now I’m second guessing myself because I genuinely wasn’t trying to police him. I just felt blindsided and dismissed.
AITA for thinking this was something that should at least have been communicated beforehand?