She doesn't know yet
Made the decision months ago and spent the last 8-10 weeks talking to different attorneys to determine best course of action. Filing the petition this week. We have a summer vacation, just me and the kids that's been planned for months. She's going to be notified while I am hundreds of miles away so that I can keep her behavior and inevitable explosions far away from the kids.
Since the time I have made this decision, she has belittled and insulted me in front of my children, called me a shitty parent in front of them, insulted and screamed at the kids so violently that they burst into tears while she berated them into a literal corner, sent me insulting Facebook reels about how I need to be earning her respect, and been messaging her personal trainer (which she spent my money on) in completely inappropriate ways about how she wants to put her hands all over him. I don't know if they're actually hooking up, and frankly, I don't really care at this point.
I am disgusted and worn out, and it's been like this for years. All I feel at this stage is relief for what's to come.