It's tolerance, not love now
I (19F) am so tired of my parents. Ever since the start of college last year to now, it's just one thing after another. Over the years my mother has been telling me things that make me lose respect for her and my dad is just stagnant. He doesn't change.
From her cheating, being in mental hospital for her BPD, an emotional divorce (can't afford financially), Dad isn't getting help for his ADD/ADHD, I'm trying to make sure my younger brother doesn't go insane, it's all so much.
I already feel horrible about my anger I have towards my parents and it's killing me and I know if I snap, things will go to all hell. My parents are so... They're doing their best but it's at the cost of their mental and me and my brothers. I want to get out but I can't. It's so fucking painful and I have to honestly say.
I don't love them anymore. I don't feel anything for them. It's just tolerance. I keep up my usual affection because if I change, they'll get nosy. I'm so tired of this dude.